I see the old rules are back. In which case, I guess I'll have to revise the old disclaimers, too. Here's a rough draft, based on the original:
Why do I include all these warnings, sirens, and sledgehammer-to-the-head graphics telling you not to take this seriously? Years ago, a poster claimed that every one of my posts (and I quote) "end up making FReepers look publicly stupid." Please remember that those are not my words. Now I'm appreciative of the compliment, but this is not the place to brag about my I.Q. Said poster insisted that I provide sufficient warnings on all my humor threads, in advance, telling you that you're about to read something ficticious and humorous. Posters like these believe that there is a need to prevent you from having to think about what you're reading, and hurting your brain in the process. Remember that I give you all more credit than that, but it doesn't make it any better if someone else doesn't. Someone else thought that your posts were making you look stupid, and that you needed these warning labels to protect you from yourself.
The Volks are too easily distracted. They'll go for almost anything put in front of them, if you don't mind me saying so, mein fuhrer.