That is exactly my point. Jesus honored his mother before death by asking a friend to make sure she was taken care of (my understanding of a Jewish 'first born' responsibility). But he was quite clear that he was all about his father's business, he only did what he saw the father do and only said what he heard the father say.
The bible talks about those that 'stick closer than a brother' - it doesn't surprise me that he gave the charge of his mother's care to his closest friend. I am not sure what his culture/tradition dictates. And her presence in the upper room - I believe she was there as a follower of Jesus, one of 120 in need of a savior, and following the teaching of the master to wait upon the holy spirit. To my knowledge, none of the 120 she was with wrote anything outlining any special treatment for her.
Then it was clearly his Father's will that the 12 year old Jesus, about his Father's work in the temple, return home with his earthly parents in obedience. If Jesus' willingness to submit to human parents isn't "special treatment" recorded in writing, I'm not sure what is!
To my knowledge, none of the 120 she was with wrote anything outlining any special treatment for her.
Most of those 120 probably didn't write ANYTHING since teaching at that time was for the most part transmitted orally. Even so, there is enough written to see that Mary had a special place in God's plan and Jesus himself revered her for it.
First, God didn't need a human parent but CHOSE to come to us this way. Second, as I noted above, we see Jesus honoring Mary with obedience. Third, we see Jesus honoring her request at a wedding despite his differing opinion. Fourth, we see Jesus providing for her in his agony. Surely he could have made arrangements before his death. But he chose to honor John the beloved with his most cherished one, and to commend his most cherished one to his beloved apostle. Fifth, we see Mary as the only non-apostle who the Holy Spirit inspired Luke to name in Acts 1:12-14.
I believe she was there as a follower of Jesus, one of 120 in need of a savior, and following the teaching of the master to wait upon the holy spirit.
I believe what scripture says in Lk 1:35 that Mary was overshadowed by the Holy Spirit and subsequently filled with divine life (Jesus in her womb). Why wouldn't she want to witness John (given to her as son at the cross) and the other apostles receive the same Holy Spirit? And unless the apostles were unaware of Jesus' holy conception, why wouldn't they want one overshadowed by the Holy Spirit praying with and for them?