Hugs to you, svcw!
This is a heartbreaking situation. It sounds so like what my husband’s sister went through with her first husband, right down to what’s going on with the kids. With God, my SIL and her daughter made it through, and came out the other side into blessings. I believe the Lord can and will do the same for your daughter and your grandchildren. I’m going to being praying for them, and for you, too.
You hang in there. God bless you, friend.
Thank you