Yes, Sister Katherine Marie. :o)
First of all, speaking the truth CAN be done with love, gentleness, patience and respect. It is ALWAYS my intent. That another interprets correction or disagreement over doctrine as "anger, malice or hate", when the comment is not a personal attack, is not something that can be controlled and has to fall back on the one who feels his ox is being gored, to coin a phrase.
The issue of grace vs. works most certainly DOES pertain to the faith vs. works argument. The very meaning of the term "grace" implies:
"Divine love and protection bestowed freely on people"
"the state of being protected or sanctified by the favor of God"
"an excellence or power granted by God"
There is a special and specific reason why God chose the word. By it's very definition and use in Holy Scripture, it implies unmerited favor. Thus, when salvation is said to be by grace through faith and not of works, it is plainly understood to mean man does not work for the gift. The use of the word "gift" also relays that sense. The passage, Ephesians 2:8,9 says:
"For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast"
There are many other verses throughout both the Old and New Testaments that speak of God's grace. This grace is balanced with his holiness and justice. His holiness demands perfect righteousness to be in his presence. His justice demands a satisfactory payment for sin. His love was what makes eternal salvation a free gift - another word used in Scripture. A free gift means exactly that - nothing is done to buy it or earn it but it is given freely. God says this gift is given to all who accept it by faith. In Romans 6:23, Paul says, "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Let me make sure you do not misunderstand my point here, I do not believe that a Christian should, or can really, just accept the gift and then continue on in his sinful life as if nothing changed. Jesus said quite clearly that he is the vine and we are the branches. We bear "fruit" by our position in Christ and this fruit IS good works - love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. (Gal. 5:22) So, though we are NOT saved because of our works but by God's grace through faith, we are STILL created unto good works which God has prepared for us (Ephesians 2:10). A genuine, born again believer in Christ WILL demonstrate their faith BY their works - but it is NOT their works that save them. It is a GIFT given by grace through faith.
This is what they call a breakthrough moment. In comparison to this shared truth our other doctrinal differences are really quite insignificant. One by one, we are accomplishing that agate ring of His Church.
God bless you and good night.
It's projection, plain and simple.