The Pope has forbidden Baptism to twins of the same sex who are the children of same sex couples in churches which contain statues of Sts. Cosmas and Damien and are located in Minnesota.
A Vatican spokesman who declined to identify himself, said that ".. a Papal dispensation is available if the godparents are themselves twins, or Twins fans." In fact, he said it was a "Lead Pipe Cinch."
BTW, The Tiber River has very high levels of lead, which has actually been of benefit to the Papacy, as Roman mobs no longer throw unpopular Popes into its waters because of Italian EPA rules on exposure to the toxic metal.
Nice touch with Minnesota; the home of the Twin Cities!!!