I can truly appreciate how liturgical abuse might have this effect on you; I have been there, as well. 18 years is a long time to deprive yourself from receiving our Lord, truly present, in the Eucharist. In turning your back on the abuse at that particular parish, you are punishing only yourself. Please take a moment and visit the following link. Then, look around your community and seek another catholic parish. Regardless of the abuse, the words of consecration remain valid, as disturbing as that may seem. Look around and test the waters at a different parish. Much has changed over the past 18 years.
Hate to report this NYER
At my local Childhood Cathoic church only people want serve in the mass are Altar female servers
I think reason why the boys lazy