If you looked into your seer stone to discern what my thoughts and feelings are - you need to send it back and get your money back. There is joy in my life, I only want to have you leave mormonism and enjoy true joy and not fret about whether or not you are worthy enough to be let into heaven.
If there is so much joy in you life than why are you engaging in being ornery?
Unless being ornery is what brings you joy!