I don’t know. Her sister goes to mass every day and her parents are so Catholic that we were barely able to get them into our church for our wedding (we were both 44 at the time - to give you some “age” perspective).
There is so much ritual and recital and “not” bible reading that I’m not sure what the average Catholic’s perspective on all of it is. I do know that it is a common dilemma to have people recite a thing from childhood and never really understand the actual deep meaning of what they are saying. And when they do figure it out, they dump it.
I was in my late-twenties when I discovered that a phrase I always used, “Jewed the guy down”, had the word “Jew” in it. At that point I discovered the phrases roots and stopped saying it.
I think that sort of thing may have been going on with my wife.
I will say this: As a woman herself, my wife believes that the idea that Mary died a virgin is preposterous, unless she had some sort of mental or physical defect.
There is so much ritual and recital and not bible reading...
The entire Mass is based on scripture. It kind of sounds like you wold hope Catholics gathered for an hour of reading Scripture when they go to Mass. Well, they do.
Families can make religious life very stressful. It sounds like you and your wife are in a good place with the Lord and that her family should just take a chill-pill. Sorry about that, my prayers are with you for some family harmony.