Outsourced prayer lines confuse callers [Satire alert]

Lark News ^ | Vol. 4 Issue 5

[xjcsa]

I’m-not-sure-if-this-is-satire-or-not-ping.

I don't know, I checked the source website, and I'm pretty sure Calvin grads dominate 2009 pastors draft is legit.

[Nervous Tick]

>> I’m-not-sure-if-this-is-satire-or-not-ping.

Personally, I’m going with “satire”. However, like all good satire, it’s close enough to believable to make you fall for it for a short time, *if* you’re jaded enough to think society has gone far enough around the bend.

Unfortunately, I happen to be just that jaded! :-)

[earlJam]

Caller: I am calling and would like to confess my sins.

Operator: "You are VERY bad man."

[dog breath]

This is almost s funny as the Bob and Tom bit where they have the outsourced porn line. In that one a guy with a thick Indian accent pretends he is a hot college coed.

[Nervous Tick]

>> I’m pretty sure Calvin grads dominate 2009 pastors draft is legit.

No. That can’t be true.

Everyone who follows the sport KNOWS the Baptists have a stronger senior class this year.

[DouglasKC]

I almost...was real close...to falling for this and had my post ready that said "You can't make this stuff up!"....and then i realized you can.

Funny piece!

[La Lydia]

This wins the “Unclear on the Concept” award of the week.

[Dixie Yooper]

Sorry, but people who worship with a remote control in hand, deserve this kind of devotion...

[SJSAMPLE]

and maybe pull the head off a stray chicken

Is that a euphamism?

If so, I can relate.

[Mercat]

90% of the merchandise in my local Mardal’s Christian store is made in China. I’m shopping for a chaplet/rosary and may have to spend a lot on-line, maybe from Ireland although in Ireland almost all the tourist trinkets were made in China. sigh.

[WakeUpAndVote]

http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=farting+preacher+2&hl=en&emb=0&aq=2&oq=farting+preacher#

[VRWCTexan]

Thanks - you areadly posted my precise assessment.

[Liberty1970]

I am going to need you to get your Bible and reinstall your faith. < /thick Indian accent>

ROFL!!! Perfect addendum to this article. :-)

[LomanBill]

May all the gods bless you mightily; and, would you like super-sized slurpy with that?

Here's Homer Simpson, connected to the "prayer line"...



"Buy More, Be Happy"--THX1138

[Niuhuru]

Go find some Democrats!

[AnnGora]

Hey people,
Forget the middle man. Get on your knees and talk directly to God. I promise, He will listen.

[smellmygunpowder]

State minimum pricing on all prayers after 5:00 PM weekdays and on weekends.

[Slings and Arrows]

May all the Mods ping you mightily.

[I know I've pinged this article before. I don't care. And yes, it's satire.]

[MaryFromMichigan]

I called one of those prayer lines.

First thing the guy said, (and I’m not making this up) is, “You need to get rid of the jelly fish.”

Freaked me out!

(How did he know?)

[Attention Surplus Disorder]

Hilarious!