I think the “measure” refers to charity and generosity; and not to condemning someone to hell.
The latter is not quantifiable. The former, is.
Oh, and all these verses were imagined and written down by men, by the way.
When caught red handed taking words out of context, immediately claim down is up, and that the origina speaker was irrelevant anyway.
I assume this behavior carries over to the other relationships and discourses in your life.
I am sad for you, and for your family.