You are somewhat correct in stating that religion is not a buffet to pick and choose what we want to believe.
The correct way to “pick” a church (I hate that term, because it does not clearly reflect what I believe is the work of God in leading us to a particular church), is to read the Bible for yourself, study, and then find the church that most reflects the New Testament church. If a church is run in a way that teaches, preaches, and practices that tradition is as important as scripture - look out. That introduces man into the equation.
And don’t fall for any particular church’s propaganda. Some are very good at advertising and promotions (there are advertising agencies now dedicated to church promotion!). Find a church that will take you by the hand and teach and help you to mature as a Christian - all the while giving BIBLICAL proof (in context, not just pulled out of rightful context to make a point) for their beliefs and teachings.
And start the search off with PRAYER!. There is no special formula for prayer. While there is what we call the “model prayer” in Matthew (sometimes called the “Lord’s Prayer”), it is a guideline as to what we are suppose to pray for and about. The words themselves are not magical. But they provide an outline to help us focus our prayers on what we need to - glorifying God for who He is, Thanking Him for what He has done for us, and bringing before His throne our petitions for others, for our own ability to discern and to do His will, and finally for the desires of our heart, all in the context of HIS Will.
If you approach finding a church home this way, I believe the Lord will lead you to the right church.
Excellent post.
First pray about doing God’s will.
Study and search ( while simultaneously praying).
Listen to the Spirit.
If a person of good will do this, God will direct him to the church in which he can blossom as a Christian and do His will.