Posted on 08/15/2008 11:50:44 AM PDT by Alex Murphy
DALLAS (ABP)—Men are disappearing from the church.
According to the Barna Research Group, there are 11 million to 13 million more American women who are born again than there are born-again men. While nine out of 10 senior pastors are men, a majority of regular church attenders are women.
Not only are women the majority of born-again American Christians, the Barna Group reports, “Women are the backbone of the Christian congregations in America.”
Perhaps indicative of women’s sense of spirituality, 41 percent of women said they have set specific spiritual goals they hope to accomplish in the coming year or two. Only 29 percent of men have identified such spiritual goals.
“Women, more often than not, take the lead role in the spiritual life of the family,” said George Barna, president of the research group. “Women typically emerge as the primary—or only—spiritual mentor and role model for family members. And that puts a tremendous burden on wives and mothers.”
Pam Durso, associate executive director of the Baptist History & Heritage Society, agrees women play a major role in families as spiritual mentors. “One aspect of that is that mothers generally are the ones who do the scheduling of events and the planning of activities, including church attendance and church-related programs.”
But that’s nothing new, Durso argues. Historically, women have dominated the membership of Baptist churches.
“Here is something to think about: Is 61 percent for female participation really a change for Baptists? Over the years, many Baptist churches have had a majority of female members,” Durso said.
At First Baptist Church of America, in Providence, R.I.—the premier Baptist congregation in the New World—59 percent of the members from 1730-1777 were women, Durso noted. From 1779-1799, that percentage dropped by only 1 percent to 58 percent.
“So, perhaps the question is not where have all the men gone, but is instead where have men been all these years?” Durso said.
David Murrow, author of Why Men Hate Going to Church, believes the way churches market themselves affects the demographics of their memberships. According to Murrow’s Church for Men website, a typical congregation draws an adult crowd that’s 61 percent female and 39 percent male.
“It’s widely believed, and rarely spoken of, that men feel church is something for women, children and grandparents,” Murrow said. “If a man becomes involved (in a church), then he is less manly.”
Murrow believes this trend began during the Industrial Revolution in the 1840s. Harsh economic conditions drove men to seek jobs in mines, mills and factories. While men worked, families were left behind for longer periods of time. The only people to be found in congregations were women, children and older men. Women began to add socials like teas, quilting circles and potluck dinners.
“The able-bodied man all but disappeared from the church,” Murrow said.
Murrow mentions on his website, www.churchformen.com, that many who have grown up in the church don’t recognize the “feminine spirituality.” But to the masculine mind, it’s obvious as the steps in front of the door.
“He may feel like Tom Sawyer in Aunt Polly’s parlor. He must watch his language, mind his manners and be extra polite. It’s hard for a man to be real in church because he must squeeze himself into this feminine religious mold,” Murrow writes on the site.
The tendency of targeting women has grown with the increased popularity of contemporary worship, Murrow added.
Hymns used to be tuned into the masculine heart by alluding to God as a mighty fortress, Murrow noted. Songs such as “Onward Christian Soldiers” spurred men in their faith.
“But now worship sounds like a Top-40 love song,” Murrow said. “They are wonderful and biblical, but it’s not the sentiment that will rally a bunch of men.”
Romantic music is a response to the market of single women, Murrow added. “They provide a Jesus image who wants to steal away with them … which doesn’t appeal to men.”
“Are we going to allow the market to drive the church, or the Bible to drive the church?”
Murrow suggests there’s nothing wrong with the gospel—just the way Christians present it. “We just need to change the culture container that we are delivering it in and should be willing to follow the example of churches who succeed in reaching men,” he said.
A leading example is Christ Church of the Valley in Phoenix, Ariz. The church markets to men through the events promoted, down to the colors and design of the building. The church even changes the range of the worship songs so men can feel comfortable singing.
“Everything we do when it comes to marketing is geared toward men in the 25-45 range … an underserved demographic in the church market today,” said Michael Gray, communications coordinator of Christ Church of the Valley.
The church offers activities like motorcycle and sport groups. One of the groups is called The Edge. There men can rappel down cliffs, jump out of airplanes and bungee jump off bridges. The purpose is to cause men to take a step of faith and stretch their comfort zones. The ministry is a spiritually challenging group, not just physically challenging. While the group focuses on adventurous activities, their ultimate goal is to lead people into an adventure with Jesus Christ.
“The Edge helps get men plugged into the church and hanging out with other men, outside a church setting,” Gray said. “It shows that we are men’s men, and we don’t just sit in shirt and tie on Sundays with our leather-bound Bible”
There is more than one way to present the gospel in a way that contemporary men will respond to, Murrow said. But it begins with the congregation understanding it must make an intentional effort to reach out to men.
“People have to realize it’s a problem. They need to wake up and look (at) how magnetic Jesus was to men. We have a 70-to-80 percent failure to boys. I don’t think that’s (God’s) will.”
We have men’s meetings occasionally where everyone brings a dish to pass. They love that!
If I were having an audience of the King of Kings, you bet I would sing and cheer and dance. And I bet He’d love it.
and not true. Worship varies in each church, of course, depending on who is leading it. Our church has excellent worship and the men seem to enjoy it too. We had an African American professor who could REALLY worship. It was grand to watch him love the Lord that way.
What a wonderful testimony! When men begin to teach Sunday School, work in VBS, and take the headship of their church and families, miracles can happen. Hallelujah.
That’s only one reason why I DON’T go to a Catholic church, LOL.
I don’t buy this at all.
How about this is more about the fact that SOME women need to blah blah blah blah endlessly on a subject and men just need to deal with it once.
WOman will have to go on and on about faith and salvation.
man will just go: salvation? yes. next.
Also does not distinguish that many time the good father is home recoving from working six days to put food on the table so wife and kids can go to church.
Not even in the charismatic Catholic parishes?
I'll stand by my position that churches that play mainly 'Jesus is my boyfriend' type music are going to end up with a predominately female body of worshipers.
That's a father that needs to re-order his priorities.
It would be great if more men got involved in children’s ministry. By 10, the boys are sick of all the women and need the example of strong Christian men. What a great service that would be to the young men of the future.
Ridiculous. And we don’t play Jesus is my boyfriend music in our church. Try again...
Good for you. We had a national dance conference and teaching at church last weekend and it was marvelous. The pageantry, the costumes, the dances and teachings were anointed of God. The decorations and banners were inspiring. God is bringing liturgical dance back to the church where it belongs. The devil has had music and dance long enough!
You are the one who identified your church to my previous posts.
We are many parts, we are just one body, the body of Christ.
We are many parts, we are just one body, the body of Christ.
>>I hate to be a wet blanket, and this is rather off-topic, but I’ve seen this verse misused enough that I have to speak up: the subject of the verse is church discipline. It comes at the end of the passage where Christ tells us to confront a sinning brother first on our own, then with witnesses, then in front of the whole congregation.<<
No problem. And I think the context does zero in on a direction slightly different than where I was going. But the verse before 20 really helps to clarify, especially beginning with the word “begin”: “Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven.”
That is very specific yet broad, and also very, VERY exciting. But it does not address the point I was trying to make, as you pointed out.
How do you feel about the other verse I used (Hebrews 10:25)
>>I don’t buy this at all.<<
At all? I can guarantee it DOES happen. The real question is just how much. We can agree to disagree on that.
>>How about this is more about the fact that SOME women need to blah blah blah blah endlessly on a subject and men just need to deal with it once.<<
Your statement implies that ones discovery, regarding Christ, is a finite event. It isn’t. It is like the professions, where you need ongoing education throughout your carreer. Knowing God is a lifelong study and relationship. Church attendance (fellowshiping with, and discussing Jesus and God with other believers) is part of that discovery. It is also very, VERY rewarding.
>>Also does not distinguish that many time the good father is home recoving from working six days to put food on the table so wife and kids can go to church.<<
The best way to recover IS to attend church. For me, the best part is Adult Sunday school. It is like a glass of water in the desert. It is like a foot rub after standing all day.
Denominations only divide when we let them.
I believe there are people in every denomination on earth who God will call out of their denominations to form the Body of Christ and it will operate in the power Christ operated in.
A person who is saved is already a member of the body of Christ.
Yes, we are all one body, HIS body. Thanks.
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