Replies

Answer: you stop having sexual relations with your wife.You deny yourself and suffer for her sake. That's what love is.

Why do you assume that it is only I who would suffer? In a healthy marriage where sexual relations are both a celebration of the possibility of procreation and a unifying symbol of the couple's love, we would both suffer. And so I infer from your post that one cannot enjoy the unity aspect of sexual relations unless one also accepts the possibility for procreation, even if by procreating you place at risk the life of the mother and the baby. And what if by denying sexual relations, you cause undue stress in the relationship? What if divorce results? Is that also love?

Why do you assume that it is only I who would suffer? In a healthy marriage where sexual relations are both a celebration of the possibility of procreation and a unifying symbol of the couple's love, we would both suffer.

D'accord.

And so I infer from your post that one cannot enjoy the unity aspect of sexual relations unless one also accepts the possibility for procreation, even if by procreating you place at risk the life of the mother and the baby.

That is what the Church teaches.

"'[E]very action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible' is intrinsically evil"...
— [Catechism, Part 3, Sec. 2 2, Ch. 2 2, Art. 6, Sub. 3, H2]
"In conformity with these landmarks in the human and Christian vision of marriage, we must once again declare that... every action which, either in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible [excluded as licit means of regulating birth]... [I]t is not licit, even for the gravest reasons, to do evil so that good may follow therefrom; that is, to make into the object of a positive act of the will something which is intrinsically disordered, and hence unworthy of the human person, even when the intention is to safeguard or promote individual, family or social well-being.
— [Paul VI, Humanae Vitae, 14.]

And what if by denying sexual relations, you cause undue stress in the relationship?

Then it becomes the responsibility of the man and wife to seek help in coming to terms with these stresses.

What if divorce results? Is that also love?

For the faithful Catholic, divorce is not an option. Should circumstances require one or both partners to renounce the licit sexual activity of marriage for the sake of God, they should seek support from their friends, families and ministers in coming to terms with this sacrifice.

Sacrifice is, as you know, the very root of the Christian faith. Our Lady was a perpetual virgin dedicated to the Lord; St. Joseph knew Our Lady was off limits, yet he sacrificed his own sexual desires as a love offering to his Son. If faced with the opportunity to emulate these heroes of the Faith, shall we do less?