It's not based upon my feelings. And this response comes after much reflection on how I was saved. There was a point where the Holy Spirit began working on my heart. Though my heart was inclined towards sin, He touched it and gave me the "want to" to come to Christ. I came to Christ when He drew me. I believed the truth He told me, but even that faith to believe was a gift of God's. It is all of Him, and not of me.
I'm not agreeing you cannot be saved without Grace, but you seem to have taken this to such an extreme that there can only be an illusion of free will.
And along the way made God capricious and.. well, cruel.
I can see how you get there, but only by making some wrong turns, because God is not cruel.
I'm not disagreeing you cannot be saved without Grace..