LOL!!! I remember when my wife went into labor I started "coaching" saying, "Breath in, breath out." She grabbed my shirt and yelled, "Just get me an epidural." So much for the Lamaze classes and my $20 bucks.
Ah, I sat in the bull pen watching the Celtics in the playoffs. I figured the medical people had enough on their hands with K that they didn't need another patient to care for.
Even though I never married, I always had a deep respect for the Covenant between man and woman, I really did. Each time I came close to doing it though, I began to experience panic attacks because I thought it a kind of prison. I could never contemplate divorce being an option if things didn't work out. I just couldn't. This was a Vow I'd be taking before God, and that really scared me.
When I was 24 and seriously contemplating it for the first time, I sought the advise of a priest because I was worried about a few things. He gave me some really good advise, though I have no idea how I got through that conversation.
The man I was going to marry was a Protestant and nominally Christian, but not averse to marrying in the Catholic Church which my parents would not have insisted upon but would have preferred. He was a marvelous impressionist; he was as good as Rich Little, I kid you not. I really loved him a lot. We didn't argue very often, we were very compatible, but the few times that we did I'd get sick to my stomach that's how much I hated being at odds with him.
Now, at 50, I see that embracing the Covenant isn't a matter of certainty at all, and that it's the uncertainty that gives the Covenant it's deepest meaning, and it's the uncertainty that holds the possibility for holiness on the part of each, and that instead of it being just your being moving in His, it then becomes a matter of that one being of husband and wife moving in His.
For the first time in my life I can say that I'd like to marry, and I ask God to give me just one more chance, if it be His Will. If it never happens you'll hear nary a peep from me because God gave me more than my share of opportunity and I was disobedient in the extreme, and though I never denied God in my mind and in my heart, disobedience and atheism are at bottom, indistinguishable. Calvin was right when he asserted that Adam and Eve's true unbelief. A Father's patience is not inexhaustible, after all, and sometimes the only way a lesson is truly learned is if it's made permanent.
I think it was Billy Graham's wife who when asked what the secret to a successful marriage was, replied "both need to be really good forgivers."
Lately, I've just descended into a pit of darkness and the unforgiven (We all got it 'comin!) and the person it's wounding most is me. Forgiving maybe better for the forgiver than for the forgiven, as selfish as that sounds. My sins are legion, who am I not to forgive?
I think it's probably a good idea that I take a hiatus from FR, as I seem to only be capable of picking at a wound. A wound that if I leave alone will surely heal. I told Dr. E this a few days ago but persisted all the same.
I really do have an ether affection for you all, so a Blessed and merry Christmas to each of you, and to all on the thread as well. It's Christmas!
Oh Holy NightMy apologies to any one on the thread who I may have offended, and a special Merry Christmas to you, RM. Must be a thankless job, but you really are fair, and I think that should be appreciated by all.The stars are brightly shining
It is the night of the dear Savior's birth!
Long lay the world in sin and error pining
Till he appear'd and the soul felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn!Fall on your knees
Oh hear the angel voices
Oh night divine
Oh night when Christ was born
Oh night divine
Oh night divine
On a separate note, Dr. E., I think I did pretty well on my test. I'll know just how well in a couple of weeks, and thanks for the vote of confidence.
Finally, Freedom of Conscience is essential to taking God's Hand as He extends it to you. Freedom is of God and not subject at all to the dictates of man. Let me leave my Reformed brothers and sisters with a quote from Jeremiah Burroughs, one of the leaders of the Westminster Assembly (1642-49), and a heartfelt thank you for your fellowship.
Godly people are divided in their opinions and ways [but] they are united in Christ. Though our differences are sad enough, yet they come not up to this: to make us men of different religions. We agree in the same end, though not in the same means. They are but different ways of opposing the common enemy. The agreeing in the same means, in the same way of opposing the common enemy, would be very comfortable. It would be our strength. But it cannot be expected in this world . . . . [O]ur divisions have been and still are between good men; there are as many godly Presbyterians as Independents.