Don't you know, you're just being exclusivist, paternalistic, unenlightened. God calls the church to be inclusive, tolerant, diverse, and accepting of the feminine divine. This means working to rid the world of malaria, AIDS, and intolerance. You know that, right? Because if you don't the mainline churches are working hard so that you
will come 'round to their new call to justice. Oh, I forgot abortion and same-sex marriages being acceptable because God is a forgiving God and wouldn't want you to be so judgmental. Oh, and how could I forget...you have to understand that Jesus isn't the only way of salvation and that these churches are going to take back the Scriptures from right-wing fascists who have hijacked Scriptures and have used them to oppress the marginalized. So, you better get used to praying to Mother Jesus.
Whew! I think that covers it.