Unforgiveness carries a penalty with it. If we don't forgive neither will our Father in heaven forgive. I imagine there's a day-to-day aspect of that that applies even for a secure Christian who has been forgiven and saved. There are little forgivenesses that come regularly into our lives.
My concern with infidelity, Rn, is the one you mention. Also, I'm concerned with human emotional capacity. It is my sense that people are constructed differently, and that there are some things that some people can handle that other people just cannot handle. I have witnessed something like this over the years in my counseling of infidelity cases. For some, the betrayal is so painful to them that they simply cannot overcome it.
I've wondered if this is the reason the Lord allows divorce in the case of infidelity.
So, while it isn't required that the couple of infidelity dissolve their marriage in a divorce, I can see concern for the brutalized spirit of the wronged partner being just cause to permit them to depart if it is simply more than they can handle.
Can not or will not? There is a difference. The culture makes love some mysterious "feeling". If it is not there then they can move on.
I believe love is a conscious decision and so is putting a past hurt behind you. There are many people that like being the martyr and like controlling a spouse with guilt.
I can understand that the "world" may find forgiveness impossible, but to the saints, we have a model of forgiveness and mercy in God. Each of us has been forgiven much, how can we withhold that from others ?
I do not believe that divorce of a saint is ever pleasing to God. If we want above all things to please God , divorce is not an option IMO.
Happy New year xzins , the best to you and yours and safety for your son