As I wondered the same thing myself when I was still Anglican, seeing disturbing patterns that were no different from the ECUSA, what kept coming to mind then, and comes to mind now is this:
The "innovators" and "renovators" are determined to force tacky and tasteless on everyone regardless; sort of an adult version of making a child eat a particularly nasty and poorly cooked green vegetable and telling them they must eat it and like it, then adding that all the grownups ate the chocolate pudding cake so there's no dessert.
The line might go something like this: "We know better than you what is good taste and worship. You will stop der bitching and endure what we determine and you will like it. You hear, you will like it. We are the church nannies and we know best. Now hush up while scintillating eardrum-piercing soprano sings Kumbaya (or other banal tune) for the next 15 minutes before we partake of the peanut butter cookies....er, hosts. Sieg Heil!"
I read some of your posts and was wondering, assuming "outsiders" might notice some of these disconnects, what would I tell them about coming into the church? How would I explain why Kerry can receive communion in one catholic church and not another, all united with Rome? I don't think most people fret about any of this if they even happen to notice unless it comes out on the front pages of the papers and the nightly news. Even then, people have the gift I don't have of dismissing and rationalizing some of the ugly things. I almost envy people who just do their own thing and don't worry about the rest of it. They go to church, see their friends and get on with their lives.
Maybe it's wheat and tares thinking on the part of our leaders. Lord knows Catholic apologists use that analogy often enough. We are all sinners, but we all know that weeds (which are stronger than tender plants) will ultimately choke the life out of everything in the field if they are allowed to grow unchecked.
As to kumbaya, I'm a little more moderate on that than most, so long as the essential teachings of the faith are not compromised and trampelled upon. When things come down to style and taste, there is room for both so long as they are canonically permissible. I guess my mental model for that attitude comes from the bible where the early Christians weren't hung up on forms of worship and music. They had yet to hammer that all out. I think the English underground masses must have been pretty plain, stripped down to all but the essentials the people missed most when they were taken away.
I agonize on what Jesus would have to say about it. The still small voice says, "What is that to you? Come, follow Me."
I empathize with people who fled the apostasy in the other churches and thought they had found peace and safety in the Catholic church, only to be tossed about again like a reed in the wind once again.