USO Canteen FReeper Style ~ CANTEEN MUSIC DEDICATION ~ September 06 2003

MoJo2001, Kathy in Alaska , 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub and FRiends of the Canteen

[Pippin]

Hey, Tom!

I grabbed 200 yesterday! NEENER!

[tomkow6]

Today's FEEBLE attempt at humor:

At age 85, Morris marries Lou Anne, a lovely 25-year old. Since her new husband is so old, Lou Anne decides that after their wedding she and Morris should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together. After the wedding festivities, Lou Anne prepares herself for bed and the expected "knock" on the door. Sure enough the knock comes, the door opens and there is Morris, her 85-year-old groom ready for action. They unite as one. All goes well, Morris takes leave of his bride, and she prepares to go to sleep.

After a few minutes, Lou Anne hears another knock on her bedroom door, and it's Morris, who looks happy and eager. Somewhat surprised, Lou Anne consents for more coupling. When the newlyweds are done, Morris kisses his bride, bids her a fond goodnight and leaves. She is set to go to sleep again, but you guessed it, Morris is back again, rapping on the door, and he is as fresh as a 25-year old. Once again they enjoy each other. But as Morris gets set to leave, his young bride says to him, "I am thoroughly impressed that at your age you can perform so well and so often. I have been with guys less than a third of your age who were only good once. You are truly a great lover, Morris."

Morris, somewhat embarrassed, turns to Lou Anne and says, "You mean I was here already?"

[Soaring Feather]

Good Morning TROOPS!

Hey Tomkow!!
Get out of bed!

Do you feel the love???

Is this your cat???

New car Tom???

Oh by the way,
Good Morning Tomkow6!!!!

[tomkow6]

 

Chicagoland Weather

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5 Day Forecast

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[tomkow6]

 

Hi,  Lizma!

Welcome to the Canteen!

Wanna buy a burka?

 

[tomkow6]

But did you notice how many I got yesterday?

[tomkow6]

 

 

[tomkow6]

what????

 

 

[tomkow6]

what????

 

 

[tomkow6]

what

[tomkow6]

50!

I feel loved already!

[Soaring Feather]

#48

[Fawnn]

66 degrees as I post this (Brrrrr!)

66 isn't brrrrrrrrrrrr, dear; that's the ideal "room temperature." ;)

[Soaring Feather]

Dang!!!!

[Soaring Feather]

Morning Fawnn
Got bird feeder problems in Texas, eh??

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

From the men in the Military and the Canteen

[minor49er]

Good Morning everybody! Good Morning troops! Today, I am going to post 2 humor attempts to make up for the one that I didn't post yesterday. Here they are:

An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. "Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area."

"Heck, Gloria," the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, "we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn't heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!"



Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been a pretty busy day, though, so Peter had to tell the first one, "Heaven's getting pretty close to full today, and I've been asked to admit only people who have had particularly horrible deaths. So what's your story?"

So the first man replies: "Well, for a while I've suspected my wife has been cheating on me, so today I came home early to try to catch her red-handed. As I came into my 25th floor apartment, I could tell something was wrong, but all my searching around didn't reveal where this other guy could have been hiding. Finally, I went out to the balcony, and sure enough, there was this man hanging off the railing, 25 floors above ground! By now I was really mad, so I started beating on him and kicking him, but wouldn't you know it, he wouldn't fall off. So finally I went back into my apartment and got a hammer and starting hammering on his fingers. Of course, he couldn't stand that for long, so he let go and fell -- but even after 25 stories, he fell into the bushes, stunned but okay. I couldn't stand it anymore, so I ran into the kitchen, grabbed the fridge and threw it over the edge where it landed on him, killing him instantly. But all the stress and anger got to me, and I had a heart attack and died there on the balcony."

"That sounds like a pretty bad day to me," said Peter, and let the man in.

The second man comes up and Peter explains to him about heaven being full, and again asks for his story.

"It's been a very strange day. You see, I live on the 26th floor of my apartment building, and every morning I do my exercises out on my balcony. Well, this morning I must have slipped or something, because I fell over the edge. But I got lucky, and caught the railing of the balcony on the floor below me. I knew I couldn't hang on for very long, when suddenly this man burst out onto the balcony. I thought for sure I was saved, when he started beating on me and kicking me. I held on the best I could until he ran into the apartment and grabbed a hammer and started pounding on my hands. Finally I just let go, but again I got lucky and fell into the bushes below, stunned but all right. Just when I was thinking I was going to be okay, this refrigerator comes falling out of the sky and crushes me instantly, and now I'm here."

Once again, Peter had to concede that that sounded like a pretty horrible death.

The third man came to the front of the line, and again Peter explained that heaven was full and asked for his story.

"Picture this," says the third man, "I'm hiding inside a refrigerator..."

[Soaring Feather]

Good morning Tonkin.

Thanks guys for the lovely flowers this morning.

[Soaring Feather]

Good morning minor!!
How be ya today???

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]