Girls, Boys, and Autism

Newsweek ^ | 8 September 2003 | Geoffrey Cowley

[Lorianne]

Girls, Boys and Autism By Geoffrey Cowley, Newsweek

Andrew Bacalao has a good, sharp mind. At 13, he's a decent pianist, a devotee of Frank Lloyd Wright, a master at videogames and jigsaw puzzles. He remembers phone numbers like a Pocket PC, and he can dismantle a radio or a flashlight in the time it takes some people to find the power switch.

[truthkeeper]

Bless you. You are wonderful! My grandson got his first close friends down the street - just regular kids - this summer. He was always far too shy to approach them before, and I didn't push him. I knew it would all happen in good time.

Anyway, I let his folks - wonderful people - know about Tanny and they were completely understanding. They just adore him. They always watch all the kids play together and report on how well they all get along, how well-mannered and smart he is, etc.

I find that most people are very cool about these things if we just EDUCATE them.

[Politicalmom]

My children love the Weather Channel too.

When we first moved to GA from CA, we had a tornado watch, and my children (the oldest my 8 year old son, with some Asperger's behaviors)were running through the house screaming "WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!"

It was hilarious.

[truthkeeper]

OMG...I would have been on the floor laughing too!

[El Gran Salseron]

I didn't read the article but my step-grandson has Asperger's Syndrome. He's a case.

Nintendo, Pokemon and online gaming are his thing.

Straight A student. Always on the computer or game console. Has total recall. Watches the in-flight progress monitors of altitude, speed, position for the entire flights from London to Houston and back. After the flight he can then quote speed, altitude, projected arrival time, etc when the aircraft was at a particular longitude and latitude.

He just cannot socialize with people outside of the family and doesn't understand the most basic things about human interaction.

He takes everything said to him very literally. Things are either black or white with nothing in between. His sense of humor is also very narrow and he cannot, ( or chooses not to, ) hold a conversation about anything but computer games, Nintendo or Pokemon. We just don't know if he can't or chooses not to.

He's 14 and sometimes it's kinda sad.

Recently however he made us all die laughing. Apparently another boy in school used the expression "son-of-a-b!tch." His dad told him that he shouldn't use that word. A few days later we were teasing him and wouldn't let him talk. He got frustrated and finally said, "If you keep it up I'm going to say "son-of-a-b!tch!" The sad part is that we have no idea if he was displaying a sense of humor or not but it sure made us laugh.

[Mfkmmof4]

I have also found that these children have a sexth sense about some things. We had to battle cancer several years ago while my son's brother went through chemo. Daniel was almost perfect. It was like he knew he could not make a fool out of himself.

[Mfkmmof4]

I would almost bet it was a sense of humor. Recently, my son who is 12 looked at me and said I am mocking you. First of all I was amazed he knew the word and am finding out the hard way he knows what it means. He is driving me nuts!

[deadhead]

I worked with Autistic adults for many years. One fellow was fascinated with birthdays. He would ask all staff about their relatives birthdays.

First time he asked me, he wanted to know my Mom's name and birthday. So, I told him my Mom's name and that she was born on April 1.

Next he asked what year, I told him. He immediately told me the day my Mom was born. I think he told me it was a Monday, I later looked it up and he was right. I was astounded! This wasn't just a lucky guess, he was able to do this with all dates.

Amazing, Tommy was amazing. Will always remember him.

[stands2reason]

William's syndrome people are the most fascinating people....

[Rabid Dog]

I've never met anyone with it but am very intrigued by the stories I hear. Talk about brains being wired differently!

[Mfkmmof4]

Exactly!! That is how some of my son's doctors have referenced him. Sometimes I jokingly say perhaps if he sticks his finger in a socket it might cure him.

[Rabid Dog]

Good idea!! (Just kidding but sometimes my husband and I just shake our heads and say - "he ain't wired right.")

[Mfkmmof4]

And then there are days we want to pull our hair out!!

[jtill]

My grandson - 6-1/2 - also doesn't understand the most basic things about human interaction. He also takes everything literally and during kindergarten last year he was very hurt by things that other children said and did. He never knew when they were teasing, being funny or serious. Things to him are black and white - no gray - but that doesn't bother me because I've never accepted anything but black or white!

He was recently diagnosed with Aspergers and has an IQ that is off the charts. While I was visiting them recently, he was busy explaining infinity to his 4 year old sister!

Lorianne, enjoyed the article and thanks for the ping!

[PennsylvaniaMom]

My next to youngest (9 years old) is very intelligent, but has problems with interaction w/people. He is incredibly literal. I am half laughing half crying reading this thread...he loves nintendo, and the computer, and gameboy, and amazes his 15 year old brother (and his friends--he is social) by beating every game and finding 'backdoors' into screens, and adding characters...and he does this w/o the gaming magazines. And he loves the weather channel. He watches it (over cartoons). He watches the local weather radar channel. He organizes his crayon box (the 96 color one that no one, absolutely no one else can use) by spectrum. When he is in an awkward situation, we can tell, he does this 'thinking face' look that he did even as a baby.

[PayrollOffice]

Thanks for the very interesting article.

[Dianna]

He's 14 and sometimes it's kinda sad.

My son is 11 and is in his first week of middle school. The first day was hell, but things are getting better. There is a boy who saves a seat for him at the lunch table. There is another boy on the bus who is friendly. He can get his locker open about half the time with out help.

He seems to be settling in (faster than I had expected!). But watching the struggle is heartbreaking. He had a dentist appt today. New dentist. It didn't go well at all. :(

[ChemistCat]

Dentist stuff is the HARDEST with these kids. My son is VERY tractable for an Asperger's child, but he still needs to be sedated for fillings and has a terrible time with the X-rays. It's serious trauma, and we have an understanding, patient dentist & staff.

[ChemistCat]

Thank you so much for sharing this with me.

All I can say is that I like all of my children the older they get, but watching my AS son grow is just amazing. When he was 4 this idiot stupid jerk of a neurologist told us to institutionalize him, that he was hopelessly retarded, would never have friends, etc etc. His ability to read (since age 2) was a freak splinter skill, useless to him without social skills, and no more meaningful than a trout learning to tell an artificial fly from a real one. SIGH.

Well, everything he said is wrong. My son is just going to be fine. He'll have two sisters to help him when we're gone, if he needs help. He may not. I begin to think he may do better in life than any of the rest of us will!

[truthkeeper]

He had a dentist appt today. New dentist. It didn't go well at all. :(

Mine has to go too and I'm dreading that. Does your son need to be put under? My grandson absolutely had to the last time, but most dentists won't do it.

[truthkeeper]

When he was 4 this idiot stupid jerk of a neurologist told us to institutionalize him

Thank God you got away from this clown. I had the opposite situation, thankfully. I already suspected autism when I tracked down the psychiatrist for a diagnosis. He was one of only two in the L.A. area (under our insurance plan) with a background in autism. He confirmed the diagnosis, but said he saw a bright future for him due to the early intervention (2 1/2) and the fact that he had superior intelligence. Amazing since Tanny was not even verbal at that time and could not make eye contact. (He has since made tremendous strides in these areas.)

He also gave me many helpful referrals and suggestions. As I said, the man was just plain good.