Butting in on fashion: Gen-X sinks to new lows

If you thought the belly-baring thing was bad enough, take a good look at the sartorial depths to which fashion has now sunk. The Los Angeles Times last week declared it "the summer of the pelvic bone." Last year's already obscene low-riders have gone the way of high-water polyester pants.

Today's hip-huggers have almost nothing but hope to hang onto anymore. The "normal" inseam-to-waist rise of 8 to 9 inches is shrinking faster than Britney Spears' record sales. To wit, Levi's has introduced a new line of jeans called "Too Superlow" for women. Upping the ante, or should I say lowering it, the teenage-girl brand Gasoline markets "Down2There" -- adjustable low-rise jeans with a built-in bungee cord designed to help the wearer drop her pants to even nastier nadirs.

Canadian teen singer Avril Lavigne's perilously sagging pants are a global youth phenomenon. "My butt crack showing is like my trademark," she gracefully explained to a music reporter. Salon.com writer Janelle Brown approves: "(T)he butt crack is the new cleavage, reclaimed to peek seductively from the pants of supermodels and commoners alike."

The late Sen. and social critic Daniel Patrick Moynihan's famous phrase "Defining deviancy down" has taken on a whole new meaning.

Grown-ups, be forewarned: Avril's fashion nonsense is seeping into other markets. Levi's recently launched a "Dangerously Low" line for men. Another of its low-rise men's lines is dubbed, appropriately enough, "Offender." Actor Brad Pitt has popularized the Diesel brand low-risers. Toronto-based writer Jim Oldfield says the trend has overwhelmed mainstream men's stores and orders are already piling up for the fall. One Canadian merchant helpfully advised Oldfield that hip men are wearing the jeans commando-style.

Even expectant women can't escape these drooping duds. Popular young actress and mom-to-be Kate Hudson has been photographed parading around in low-rise cargo pants and toddler-sized crop tops to show off her growing belly. At a recent trip to my neighborhood mall's maternity store, the only jeans in my size were ridiculous low-risers with flared bottoms that needed hiking every time I exhaled.

Trust me: This nouveau plumber's crack chic does not look any better on the overweight guy crouching under your kitchen sink than it does on a six-months-pregnant lady trying to bend over to pick up her toddler without mooning the world.

What will it take to convince the current cohort of exhibitionistas that sleaze is not sexy -- that less is not always more, that low is low-class? If Generation X-rated can't be persuaded to cover up out of moral necessity, perhaps they will listen to medical authority. A warning about the health hazards of low-rise pants was published in the Canadian Medical Association six months ago. According to Dr. Malvinder Parmar, a painful condition called "meralgia paresthetica" is causing wearers of hip-huggers to experience "tingling or a burning sensation" in the thighs.

Dr. Parmar's treatment: four to six weeks in -- the horror! -- loose-fitting dresses. Must have been worse than swallowing cod liver oil.

Avril and Britney and Brad need to show their fans that a little extra fabric is not a death sentence. The late Kate Hepburn melted hearts while fully clothed in turtlenecks and roomy, belted trousers. She was a "hottie" who showed us her cheekbones, and left the rest where it should be left: to the imagination.

Alas, modesty has been long out of vogue. But it's a fashion rule of thumb that what's out eventually becomes in. The day when "clothed is the new naked" can't come soon enough.

Malkin is a nationally syndicated columnist based in North Bethesda, Md. malkin@comcast.net

Many gen yers are much more conservative than xers. While we did grow up under Clinton, we saw liberalism for the sham it is. We saw the growth of the Conservative media and grew up listening to Rush and watching Fox. I think we're a lot more promising than the previous generation. We can't be blamed for society's problems when we're just graduating college and voted in our first presidential election in 2000.

We were pretty similar....we had the hippies, McGovern, and finally Carter to show us what garbage leftism/appeasism was and Reagan (or in my case Goldwater and Heinlein) to show us the value of conservatism. My dad (born 1936) moved strongly right during that period for many of the same reasons.

On the jeans issue, I have a pair of low-rise jeans that were on clearance at Old Navy. I HATE them. I'm constantly having to pull them up and can only wear my longer shirts with them. I think it's extremely tacky when I see girls' thongs showing. I think it says a lot about a girl's morals.

A lot of 80s styles were criticized for many of the same reasons. My personal experience, then and now, is that there's not a direct relationship between outfits and morals. I've known plenty of women with shaky morals that dress(ed) conservatively, and plenty that liked to show off but maintained their standards. It usually doesn't take long to tell which is which.

-Eric

and less whiny than Gen-Xers, who all thought they were going to change the world (gee, wonder where they got that idea from) through their big dotcom fraud, and are all pissed off that they didn't get to retire at 30 after all.

What are you talking about??, You are so WRONG!!!!!!!

I hate to tell you but we Gen-Xers did change the world, Unlike the Baby Boomers who accomplished nothing and are basically self serving parasites we spawned the internet and brought in the new era of the Information Age which has had an overall major positive effect all over the world that will be felt and enjoyed for generations to come.

And so what if a lot of dot.com companies went bust, The Automobile and Airplane also changed the world and look how many makers of those things went bust early on that didn't mean cars and planes were failures.

When we set out to change the world we created something unlike the Boomers who when the set out to change the world instead of creating something they instead became Lawyers and we all know how wonderful it is that we have all these lawyers and regulations running around.

Compare the Legacy

Gen-X

Spawned a new era in the history of mankind: The Information Age

Will Fight and Win the war on Terrorism.

Voted in a Republican Majority*

The Baby Boomers

The ACLU, Activist Judges, Junk Science, Tune in, Turn on and drop out, Anti-smoking/Health/Safety Nazis, RINOS, Destruction of the Nuclear Family, Destruction of the Black Extended family, Frivolous lawsuit, The Constitution as a living document, The Welfare State, The Nanny State, It it feels good do it, The Liberal Media elite, The founding fathers were nothing more than evil slave owners, Sound bites over substance or facts, Abortion on demand, The Clintons, Seatbelt laws, Feminism, Tree Huggers, Criminals that have more rights than the victim, Meathead, Blame America First, Latch key kids, Kids being raised by their grandparents and/or strangers, Helmet laws for Motorcycles, Helmet laws for freaking Bicycles, Cradle to grave entitlements, War on Fat, 21 year old drinking age, Yuppies, Careers over your children, Hatred of the Military, Reporters who think they are not only part of but bigger than the story they are covering, Focus groups, Weekend dads, Single moms, Prisoner rights groups, Prozac, Ritilin, Viagra, ½ our income going for taxes, America owes me, Living past failed dreams through your children, Cocktail Parties with the likes of Micheal Bloomberg, Turning an educational system that once was the best in the world to S!@, The 2nd Amendment doesn't mean the Right to bear arms, Peacekeepers instead of soldiers, The weakening of the CIA, Power Couples, Soccer Moms, NPR, Eradication of Dodge Ball, It's all society's fault type excuses and made up syndromes instead of personal responsibility, and so many more but I will close with.

And an Obscene National Debt that WE have to pay off.

I sense extreme jealously on your part and I understand your hostility it must be hard being in a generation that has accomplished nothing and has fully or partially destroyed many great American institutions and values. You will go down as being the worst generation in American history. It must be especially hard since you are sandwiched between two Generations that has and will accomplish much and has had such a positive effect on the world.

* Yes we did vote in a Republican majority in Congress, Senate and White House but unfortuanetely those Republicans we voted in also happen to be Baby boomers and just like everything else connected to that pitiful generation they to are turning out to be failures.

Correlation is causation.

Therefore, since birds poop on statues all over the world, statues must cause birds to poop.

In fact, if there was a school with formal attire required, it would be the BEST school in the country.

/sarcasm

I'm sure the principal's strictness was useful, but self-selection probably played a role in the school's success. And I would hazard a guess that the principal knew all or most of the students. A study done a couple of years ago cross-checked all the variables that might affect education. The variable that made the most substantial difference? School size. Administrator-to-student-ratio, i.e., CHIEF principal to student ratio, is the biggest factor in student success, no matter what class size, teacher pay, or economic situation the school is in.

That's why Joe Clark kicked ass, and why California is a black hole educationally.

I wish I had the documentation on that survey. It was impressive--therefore, it was buried, and we continue to build monster schools nationwide.

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.