Three ladies were walking down the street when they found a lamp. So one of the ladies rubs it and a genie pops out. "I will grant each of you one wish, and only one wish." So the ladies were thinking long and hard when the first lady says "I got it! I would like to be extremely smart."{POOF} This lady can read the dictionary like it was nothing, spell any word, and do math within seconds. The other two girls were amazed...so the second lady says "I want to be two times smarter than my friend."{POOF} Now the second lady was two times smarter than the first...she could speak five other languages, found the formula for nuclear fusion, and explain everything about our DNA. Totally blown away, the third lady says that she has it "I want to be two times smarter than both my friends put together."{POOF} She turns into a man. :)
A Woman and a Man are both involved in a car accident. Neither are hurt, but their cars are smashed up. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says "Our cars are completely demolished, yet neither of us are hurt! This must be a sign from God!" The man replied; "Oh yes, I completely agree with you. This must be some sort of sign!"
The woman continued; "And look, here's another miracle. My car is completely smashed, yet this bottle didn't even break! How about a drink to celebrate our good fortune?" The man nods and drinks half the bottle, then passes it back to her. The woman simply puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man. "Aren't you going to have a drink?" Asked the man.
To which the woman replies; "No thanks. I think I'll just wait for the cops to show up!"
: )