Do they have advantages over Men in High S[tress] situations?
Just had to drop that one in there.
When I was younger I shot a drunk and armed intruder coming into my parents home. My Mom & Sister completely lost it!! I mean lost it...running through the house screaming and crying...LOL...I actually had to walk into the kitchen and phone 911 in order to get the ball rolling. Mind you, my Mother is married to a former Recon Marine and she herself is in charge of nationwide distribution for a Forbes 500 company. She's a pitbull. But when it got overwhelmingly salient...she went dramaqueen.
There isnt a test on the planet or any amount of statistical results that'll remove "my impression of women under stressful situations" from my head. They're just not wired for it, and no amount of slanted discussion or impure data is ever gonna change that.
I've found that both men and women can come apart at the seams under stressful circumstances. I've worked with women on ambulance runs where drugged out psycho's came at us with knives and the woman in question took the guy out. She handled it because it was her job. I know of an incident where the same woman fell apart and "freaked out" after a killing (by police) when she was off duty and it wasn't her problem. It can be a matter of circumstance. I never have a problem with a trauma case (don't get shook or emotionally stressed) when I'm in a position to help. I've got a job to do and don't have time. I'll get just as strung out and stressed as anyone, man or woman, if it's not my job to "go to work" because I don't have that reflex to fall back on.
People all react differently and the same people will react differently to different situations. I'm glad you were there to take care of your family. I wouldn't be a bit surprised to have had your mom take care of business in the same manner if you weren't there to shoulder the burden for her. Don't sell people short. You'd be surprised, both for the good and the bad, at what some people can do under the right set of circumstances.
At age 12 I surprised a burglar opening my parents' outside bedroom door at 1 a.m. (I thought it was my little sister playing a prank and was about to jump out and yell "BOO!" until I realized it was a 5'9" white guy in a tank top and 3 days of stubble.) Instead of going "drama queen" I went "war movie" and did my best Marine belly crawl backwards from the door and to the head of the stairs, where I yelled, "DADDY! There's a man on the back porch!" (I guess I should have tip-toed up to him and whispered in his ear, but time was of the essence.) While dad grabbed the shotgun from the sofa (he'd been shooting crows), mom grabbed the phone, and was on the phone quick enough for the dispatcher to hear the two shots . . . the guy was jumping off the back porch, and dad caught him with the choke barrel in the air and the scatter barrel when he hit the ground. Unfortunately it was only #6 or 7 shot.
But mom and I both kept our heads. My sister slept through the whole thing. We never heard from Mr. Perp again, but dad was sure he got at least one solid hit, and the police officer who showed up an hour later told us we shouldn't have any more problem with burglars. And we never did -- my parents left their doors unlocked and the keys in the cars for 30 years, in the City of Atlanta, with no problem.
It may just be a Southern thing, the women around here are flint-eyed mean. When there was an escaped convict around here, mom was toting a .32 revolver in her purse. She was also in a drive-by shooting in New York City more recently (at age 65). A couple of guys shot out the windows of her cab, the cabbie was screaming and praying and having hysterics, she shoved her friend down on the floor, jumped out of the back, shoved the driver over, said, "Let me drive" and got the !#@)($%)(& outta there.