Girls Can Dish It and Take It. Got a Problem?

Chicago Sun-Times ^ | May 9, 2003 | Debra Pickett

[Dirk McQuickly]

Can we officially stop worrying about girls now? From the sad and starving girls of Reviving Ophelia (Ballantine, $7.99) to the really mean girls of Queen Bees and Wannabes (Crown Publishers, $24), an entire industry is devoted to chick-related handwringing. The culture damages their fragile emotional lives, people say. Girls are afraid to speak up for themselves. Math teachers don't call on them. They bully each other to cope with their systemic oppression.

Yet, somehow, teen girls seem to be doing just fine.

They are proud of their bodies, showing off all manner of bellies below their baby-sized T-shirts. They play sports and make excellent grades and fill the campuses of elite universities. They make fabulous plans. They are so excited about life, they can barely stop talking.

They also, apparently, spend the occasional Sunday afternoon in a forest preserve, pounding the crap out of each other.

The shaky images of junior and senior girls from Glenbrook North High School, engaged in a particularly rough game of football, or maybe just a ritualized brawl, have now been broadcast worldwide, combining the titillating fascination of a "Girls Gone Wild" video with a fantastic opportunity for over-earnest adults to shake their heads over the state of these kids today.

Watching the video, adults are obligated to disapprove. Kids got hurt. Bones got broken. Things clearly got out of hand.

But there's something else about these images that deserves mention. The girls--both the ones doing the pounding and the ones sitting there and taking it like Marines--looked just as strong, fierce and stupid as any guys ever have.

That's half the reason the "powder puff" game gone bad has become an international story.

A video of a bunch of guys in a rowdy hazing ritual wouldn't have the same appeal. We expect boys to behave that way.

But seeing girls--especially well-off, suburban, white girls--get out of control, now, that's interesting. Interesting to people who are not or have not recently been teenage girls, anyway. The girls themselves are not at all surprised. They're kind of amused.

Their response to the supposedly scandalous video? A resounding "Whatever."

I did a completely unscientific survey of several very cool teen girls Thursday. It revealed unanimous agreement that teen girls beating up other teen girls is simply not news.

What did we all think they did in their spare time? Play with body-image-destroying Barbies? "Puh-lease," said one.

"Powder puff" football used to be a joke. The idea of girls playing such a rough-and-tumble sport was once ridiculous enough that people--especially guys--would pay to see it. At my high school, there was an annual game. It was the student council's best fund-raiser. Girls playing football--what a laugh.

Well, in case you've missed the last decade, here's a summary: Girls don't throw like girls anymore. In fact, girls don't do much of anything like girls anymore. They do things like themselves.

The vast majority of them are cool, smart and pretty much non-trouble-making. But, as with boys, there are always a few who have a talent for getting themselves into big messes.

Now that everyone has seen the video of a bunch of Northbrook girls getting themselves into a big mess, grown-ups feel obligated to make stern statements and issue firm punishments. It's arbitrary adult justice at its best: You kids made us look clueless--Who had any idea girls were up to such things? We were too busy trying to repair their self-esteem to notice--and now you're going to pay. We're going to make examples of you.

Of course, the violent girls who hurt others deserve to be punished. But they don't deserve to be burned at the stake of tragically troubled girlhood. They don't deserve to be treated any differently from the generations of boys who've engaged in similar behavior.

They've learned to play like the boys.

And, because they're acting so much like middle-class fraternity boys, they should be given the same punishment those guys so often get. A lecture. A temporary loss of some privileges. And a second chance.

Just like we should quit over-protecting girls, we should also refrain from overpunishing them.

Broken bones, obviously, are bad. But bones get broken during regular football games, too.

Of course, at regular football games, the guys wear pads.

Sissies.

[Dirk McQuickly]

I'm split on this. No one in their right mind would condone the level of violence that took place, but people need to get a grip and stop treating this like it's the crime of the century that an unsanctioned Powderpuff match was held with a keg in the park. As far as I can tell, this was not on school property. It should be a police matter. The school will make it's statements of outrage, then proceed to turn a blind eye to any number of house keg parties that will go down this summer...

[mewzilla]

Four kids ended up hospitalized. More were injured. This wasn't a prank. It was an assault, and it should be treated accordingly.

[Dirk McQuickly]

Like I said, it's a police matter. Those who took it to a criminal level need to be prosecuted, but I don't want to find out down the road we're expelling kids for throwing toilet paper in a tree during Homecoming week. I'm looking at the hypocrisy of the school itself, which doesn't seem to concern itself with other illegal activities of tis student body.

[zarf]

This event was NOW's dream. Lot's of wet panties over at girls=boys central.

[mewzilla]

Have you seen the tape. Not to mention that this was premeditated? Or do you think these sweete young things normally run around with paint, pig guts and ears, and animal feces? The cops need to treat this like the crime that it is, and if the parents were involved, they need to be charged to, especially if an adult bought the booze for these thugs.

[wgeorge2001]

"They've learned to play like the boys."


I am curious. I believe we have been hornswagled since the 60's and are now going into complete role reversals.
Is this a good thing and if so,why?

[Free State Four]

They've learned to play like the boys.

It's time to give Pat Ireland the kudos she deserves. Not only has she taught our girls the one-grope rule, but she has made them as crude and uncivilized as the men she abhors. Thank goodness she also has made them tough enough to kill their own babies without a twinge of regret.

[KellyAdmirer]

Seems to me that boys get suspended or prosecuted for stuff like that. No slaps on the wrist. This idea that boys never get punished for doing bad things is a complete NOW myth.

[Desdemona]

Or do you think these sweete young things normally run around with paint, pig guts and ears, and animal feces?

Sweet? Oh, I don't think so. Having been the victim of girls who bully, lie, etc., just to get their own way ans having watched enough school fights over 10 years ago, the idea that girls are sweet is a fairy tale. It's split maybe 50/50. The nastiest fights I've ever seen in school were between girls.

This was more a case of no adults were paying attention to what their kids were up to and hadn't taught them any manners. The school has no jurisdiction or responsibility, but it's name will be dragged around and they do have to respond. It's happened in other places over much less serious incidents.

It would be a good thing, IMO, to return lady-like behavior to the lexicon. ANd practice it regularly.

[GraniteStateConservative]

One of the "best small towns in America" is near me: Lebanon, NH. They have no high school cheerleading team because all the girls are playing sports.

[RonF]

Kids who were involved in drinking or violence (outside of the bounds of the football game that was played) should be busted and punished accordingly. Otherwise, it's time to get this off the front page.

[af_vet_rr]

Everybody is ignoring the parental aspect - what kind of parenting could lead to anybody thinking this kind of thing is okay, whether it's teenage girls or boys? Your right, I'm sure at least one parent or adult was involved, but overall, I really really wonder about parents that would raise such kids. If this was a football game and some kids not bruises and scrapes, that's one thing. This was something else.

[Pan_Yans Wife]

You are forgetting mob mentality. I am not excusing their behavior, at all. But, a group of large people does not normally react the way one individual would. That said, I think the girls should be prosecuted severely. Their behavior was criminal.

[asformeandformyhouse]

The author keeps referring to them as girls. That is exactly what these parents are raising, a bunch of girls. I would hope at this age they would be 'young ladies' and acting accordingly. Not that these young ladies shouldn't be involved in activities such as powder puff football, but the premeditated assault that occurred is nothing short of barbaric. I couldn't help but think of 'The Lord of the Flies'.

For the last 40 years, society has told children they are nothing but animals. Why are we surprised when they act like it?

[skeeter]

Something tells me this writer doesn't really want boys to begin treating girls like they treat each other.

If she does she needs to seek help.

[LibertarianInExile]

Your tag line kicks. Is it original?

[GraniteStateConservative]

Yes, FReeper Protagoras came up with it and I grabbed it as a tag. He then used it as his tag, but I was first.

: )

[Ignatz]

I have yet to see the video, can someone please post a link?
Thanks in advance!

[shiva]

LOL! When they run out of computer paper at the office watch them look for a MAN to go to the storage room and get another box for them. They can't handle it...too heavy they say.Ever seen a woman move her desk? You never will. Gotta look for a MAN to do that.A 12 year old BOY that never 'works out'has more strength than a grown-up woman.This
is just another way to usurp mans' masculinity. Book probably written by a lesbian that wishes she could trade her breasts for testicles.