Caption the Official South Carolina Debate Photo for the 2004 Democratic Presidential Field

Free Times of South Carolina ^ | May 1, 2004 | cover art staff

[rocky88]

Remember the musical "A Chorus Line?"

I really need this job....

Please God I need this job....

I've got to get...this....job!!!!!

[ewing]

Does Sharpton have his arms around Lieberman and Kuchinch?

[w_over_w]

Telling . . .

[Tarheel]

Some excerpts from the article that is with the picture--the whole thing is hilarious.

Welcome, Democrats!

Dear Al, Bob, Carol, Dennis, Dick, Joe, John, John and Howard:

Welcome to South Carolina!...

All of which is to say that, while we’re glad you’re here, we aren’t exactly sure why....

Not that we don’t appreciate it. Lord knows there’s no better way to spend a Saturday night in Columbia than listening to nine folks we never heard of, arguing about a presidential election that’s 18 months away, in a state they have absolutely no chance of winning....

I’m sure that after y’all spend 90 minutes on national television bashing the Confederate flag, Bob Jones and the Old South, you’ll be the most popular group of Yankees to visit Columbia since Gen. Sherman. Why, I can’t think of a better way to attract moderate, white Southern voters than to appear on stage discussing race relations with Al Sharpton, or opposition to the war in Iraq with Howard “I’m not sure the Iraqis are better off” Dean — while standing just a few miles from Fort Jackson....

Perhaps you should skip the politics and talk about yourselves and your background ... unless of course you’re a rich trial lawyer. Or a Northeastern liberal. Or a corrupt political hack who attacked the United Daughters of the Confederacy. Or a notorious race baiter who’s been convicted of libel. Or a labor union lackey. Or you called the Confederate battle flag a “symbol of hatred to most Americans.” Or you’re an anti-war extremist calling for the impeachment of President Bush....

One last thing: You can’t leave South Carolina without making a quick stop at Maurice Bessinger’s Piggy Park Gourmet Barbecue. Why, Maurice ran in the Democratic primary for governor himself back in the 1970s. Be sure to meet him, shake his hand — if possible, with plenty of members of the media around. Get lots of photos of you and Maurice talkin’ politics...

Graham is the author of Redneck Nation: How The South Really Won The War.

[lainie]

(circus music)"Step Right Up and Don't be Shy -- the Amazing Flying Sheep are coming to your town! Come join us under the big top! You will not believe your eyes!"

All tickets non-refundable.

[ewing]

Hair is a 10! brains 3....

[ewing]

That is a funny column..

[Solson]

Clinton said something to the effect of "My cabinet will be a mirror of America" and went to fill his cabinet with numerous millionaires and intellectuals.

The Democrats often talk about how they "fight for the little guy" and look at this group of "contenders." Oy!

[KateUTWS]

To quote Klem Kadiddlehopper.....doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo.

[mabelkitty]

How about "The Racism Starts Here"

[antisocial]

This is the new Politbureau !

[Dante3]

LOL!

[ewing]

This is going to be a great 8 months, as long as Reverend Al stays in the picture..

[w_over_w]

LOL! You had me believing it through the first few paragraphs.

[Tall_Texan]

"Dumb, Dumber, Even Dumber, Still Dumber, Exceedingly Dumb, Unspeakably Dumb, Dumb-as-a-Rock, Dumb-as-a-Doorknob, Dumbest and Which-Way-To-De-Welfare-Office?"

[linn37]

when is this circus coming to town?

[ewing]

ROTFLOL!!

[PetroniDE]

Nine in the photo. The liberal's version of the Supreme Court perhaps?

Quick - someone put kangaroo heads on this picture.

[LurkedLongEnough]

The Race Card players on tour.

[Marysecretary]

The dirty dozen (give or take a few)?