Comedian Rodney Dangerfield undergoes brain surgery

1 posted on 04/08/2003 3:53:45 PM PDT by NormsRevenge

To: NormsRevenge

Laughter is stronger than dirt!

2 posted on 04/08/2003 3:56:31 PM PDT by Revolting cat! (Subvert the dominant cliche!)

I'm telling ya.. I get no respect.

Godspeed Rodney.

3 posted on 04/08/2003 3:56:31 PM PDT by NormsRevenge (Semper Fi .. Prayers for the troops and families, the coalition and the FRee peoples of the world)

To: NormsRevenge

"My father carried around the picture of the kid that came with the wallet."

Prayers for Rodney.

4 posted on 04/08/2003 3:58:35 PM PDT by Pete'sWife (Dirt is for racing... asphalt is for getting there.)

To: NormsRevenge

I saw him at Cedars-Sinai here in LA about a year ago. He didn't look good at all. 'Hoping and praying for him. He's funny.

5 posted on 04/08/2003 3:59:27 PM PDT by onedoug

To: NormsRevenge

``I joined a weightlifting class ... they started me with helium balloons.''

LOL. Humor is the best medicine.

6 posted on 04/08/2003 3:59:31 PM PDT by kylaka

To: NormsRevenge

I feel for him. Getting old is a b*tch!

7 posted on 04/08/2003 4:01:28 PM PDT by BunnySlippers

Yes, prayers for Rodney!

8 posted on 04/08/2003 4:02:10 PM PDT by Geezerette (... but young at heart!)

To: NormsRevenge

"My girlfriend calls me and says 'come on over, nobodys home', so I went over, NOBODY WAS HOME!"

9 posted on 04/08/2003 4:02:55 PM PDT by bigjoesaddle (Shrug)

To: NormsRevenge

BACK TO SCHOOL is one of those movies that I can watch EVERY SINGLE TIME it's on TV. Good luck, Rodney!

10 posted on 04/08/2003 4:03:49 PM PDT by Hildy

To: bigjoesaddle

I was so poor growing up ... If I wasn't born a boy ... I'd have had nothing to play with.

A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home.

If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.

During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.

One day as I came home early from work I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, "Hey buddy, why are you doing that?" He said, "Because you came home early."

Its been a rough day. I got up this morning ... put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom.

I was such an ugly kid ... when I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.

I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

I was such an ugly baby ... my mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend.

When I was born ... the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could ... but he pulled through."

I'm so ugly ... my mother had morning sickness after I was born.

Once when I was lost ... I saw a policeman and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him, "Do you think we'll ever find them?" "He said, "I don't know kid ... there are so many places they can hide."

My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.

I'm so ugly ... I worked in a pet shop and people kept asking how big I'd get.

I went to see my doctor. "Doctor, every morning when I get up and look in the mirror... I feel like throwing up. What's wrong with me?" He said, "I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect."

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.

11 posted on 04/08/2003 4:06:31 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack

To: NormsRevenge

"And we were poor too. Why if I wasn't born a boy.... I'd have nothing to play with."

12 posted on 04/08/2003 4:07:03 PM PDT by Revolting cat! (Subvert the dominant cliche!)

To: NormsRevenge

If sex is a pain in the arse.....you're doing it wrong.

13 posted on 04/08/2003 4:10:05 PM PDT by Nick The Freeper (Tag line......I don't need no stinking tag line.)

To: NormsRevenge

"My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair."

14 posted on 04/08/2003 4:10:35 PM PDT by Revolting cat! (Subvert the dominant cliche!)

To: NormsRevenge

15 posted on 04/08/2003 4:11:34 PM PDT by cmsgop ( Arby's says no more Horsey Sauce for Scott Ritter !!!!)

"You know one of the best things about having Alzheimer's? Every morning you wake up with all new friends."

(applause and laughter from the audience)

"You know one of the best things about having Alzheimer's? Every morning you wake up with all new friends."

- Rodney from his last appearance on the "Tonight Show"

16 posted on 04/08/2003 4:11:51 PM PDT by Hillarys Gate Cult ("Read Hillary's hips. I never had sex with that woman.")

To: Revolting cat!

17 posted on 04/08/2003 4:13:03 PM PDT by ErnBatavia (Bumperootus!)

To: NormsRevenge

My prayers are with Rodney. Hopefully, he'll be back soon, talking about the doctor who performed the surgery:

"I went to see my doctor... Doctor Vidi-boom-ba. Yeah...I told him once, "Doctor, every morning when I get up and look in the mirror I feel like throwing up. What's wrong with me? He said, "I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect."

18 posted on 04/08/2003 4:13:39 PM PDT by GreenHornet

To: NormsRevenge

Best of luck to you funny man!

19 posted on 04/08/2003 4:14:23 PM PDT by dennisw

To: NormsRevenge

I told the cop on the beach that I had lost my parents. I asked "Can you help me?"...he said "I don't know, kid, there are lots of places to hide around here."

20 posted on 04/08/2003 4:15:04 PM PDT by gorush

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