PL tells Freshwater tree-sitters to get out

The Times-Standard ^ | March 06, 2003 | James Tressler

[Jeff Chandler]

Mary Bullwinkel? I just love her husband and that flying squirrel!

[goody2shooz]

Have you ever seen what happens when a bean bag is fired by a 12 gauge 3" shotgun up the side of the head of a filthy hippie?

Um...the fleas get up and leave?

[goody2shooz]

The beer kegger idea is good but to be really, really effective you must add polka music. Now that will drive out of the trees!

[technochick99]

She seemed so happy to get my call, so I think getting several emails will help!

[Tailback]

I'll bet that scumbag "Tre Arrow" screams like a little girl when they finally catch his scruffy butt. I hope there's video.

[poet]

Hi AAA;

Here's part 1:

"If a tree hugger sits upon my branch,
I'll see she buys the ranch,
If another moron takes her place,
sits upon me without a brace,
I'll send them flying thru the air,
pulling at their hair,
screaming, it's not fair,
I only wanted to give hugs,
now I'm food for the bugs,
no more spiking, you phony clowns
I'll send you toppling to the ground"

Copyright (c) 2002 By John J. Lindsay. All Rights Reserved. April 27, 2002

Part 2 to follow

FReegards

[poet]

Here'spart Deux:

The Trees Reply: Part Deux

My goodness, another one bought the ranch,
once again, sat upon my branch sit
without a brace,
I sent him flying thru space,
his friends are in a funk,
as he lays at my trunk,
oops, did I just see him squirm?
nyah, that was just a worm

Don't they know I'm very old,
that I have to go,
so other mays grow,
the morons say, no

Oh well, not to worry,
if they do it again,
they'll be sorry,
the fools rub against my grain

They did not heed my first reply,
seems that they want to die,
they continue to mess with Mother Nature,
promoting their pseudo-science,
getting the legislature,
to punish those who are defiant,
and self-reliant

Copyright (c)2002 By John J.Lindsay.All Rights Reserved

[AuntB]

I have two thoughts on this: (1) Anyone who cuts down a tree that's over a thousand years old is without concience. (2)IF this is private property, where the heck is the Sheriff?? The protesters should be handled by law enforcement, not the timber company.

[technochick99]

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down?

We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.

[sasquatch]

honey buckets

1) heavy duty sling shot
2)balloon of honey
3)Fire!
4)wasp nest
5)Fire!

The sitters around here typically dump their buckets at whoever
happens to be operating yellow or green machines.

[Cuttnhorse]

Madrone, what great stove wood!!

[ArmstedFragg]

and flying squirrel...

One of the great lines from the Murphy Brown series re: Murphy's meeting with a Russian correspondent, "she sounds like somebody who ought to be threatening 'big trouble for moose and squirrel'".

Not that Mary does, mind you, but you just reminded me of that line.

[sweetliberty]

I really like your approach and I agree that it might be effective, certainly more effective than other things that have been tried. It seems we have developed such an "us against them" mentality in almost everything and reason and and genuine compassion have been lost in the process. Granted, the attitude is understandable given that we are ceaselessly subjected to outrageous assaults against our hearts and souls, as well as our sensibilites, and I think it is a way of defending ourselves against what we can no longer process.

[sweetliberty]

"what a Shiddy Job these tree sitters's ground crews have."

Not too awful bright either I wouldn't think.

[sweetliberty]

"We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason."

ROTFL!

[sweetliberty]

Hi horsie. Long time no post! How's thing's WAY down south? I can tell you really miss that special lunacy so typical of the pacific northwest.

[Cuttnhorse]

Good morning Libs,
I haven't "seen" your smiling face and special wit for some time now. Yes, I do miss the lunacy of the Pacific NW...I just wish I were there!

[sweetliberty]

"I haven't "seen" your smiling face and special wit for some time now"

Been too busy working. I don't have the luxury of being able to hang out in trees (as much as I enjoy them) or for going around to mock the treesitters. I haven't even had near enough time for FR of late. *Sigh* Oh well; I guess it could be worse. I could have been born stupid. (Sometimes the odds seem extraordinarily high.) Hehehe...