[Kathy in Alaska]

"What a crazy winter we're all having."

Boy, HJ, have you got that right. We got another powdered sugar coating, but it's real light and blowing everywhere.

[tomkow6]

Census taker: How many children do you have?
Woman: Four.
Census taker: May I have their names, please?
Woman: Eenie, Meenie, Minie and George.
Census taker: Okay, that's fine. But may I ask why you named your fourth child George?
Woman: Because we didn't want any Mo.

[tomkow6]

A happily married man had only one complaint, his wife was always nursing sick birds.
One November evening, he came home to find a raven with a splint on its beak sitting in his favorite chair. On the dining room table there was a feverish eagle pecking at an aspirin while in the kitchen his wife was comforting a shivering little wren that she found in the snow.
The furious spouse strode over to where his wife was toweling down the cold little bird. "I can't take it any more! We've got to get rid of all of these darn..."
The wife held up her hand to cut him off in mid-curse. "Please Dear," she said, "Not in front of the chilled wren."

[tomkow6]

The banker fell overboard while taking a cruise on a friend's sailboat. The friend grabbed a life preserver, held it up, and not knowing if the banker could swim, shouted, "Can you float alone?"
"Of course!" the banker yelled back, "but this is a heck of a time to talk business."

[tomkow6]

The problem - There's a box with a hole at each end and there's a rabbit in the box. The rabbit sticks his head out of the hole in one end, and a minute later he sticks it out the other end. Half a minute later, his head appears at the opposite end, a fourth of a minute later it appears at the end opposite to that one, an eighth of a minute later...etc., etc.
How long will it take before the rabbit sticks its head out of both ends of the box at the same time?
In theory, two minutes.
In practice, no answer is possible unless you split hares.

[tomkow6]

I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.

[tomkow6]

My ten-year-old son informed us that part of his tooth had come out. We checked and, sure enough, a piece had broken off. Trying to lighten the moment, I asked my husband, "What do you suppose the tooth fairy gives for half a tooth?"
"Nothing," he replied, "She wants the tooth, the whole tooth, and
nothing but the tooth."