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Clone-producing Raelians install new President (an ideal candidate was available)
Registered ^ | 12.30.02 | Registered

Posted on 12/30/2002 12:13:33 PM PST by Registered

He won the popular vote.


TOPICS: Editorial; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: clone; gore; inventors; raelians; spacealiens
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1 posted on 12/30/2002 12:13:33 PM PST by Registered
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To: Registered

2 posted on 12/30/2002 12:16:19 PM PST by areafiftyone
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To: Registered
Nice robe Al. Better than the Buddhists have.
3 posted on 12/30/2002 12:16:26 PM PST by TroutStalker
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To: TroutStalker
m
4 posted on 12/30/2002 12:23:08 PM PST by Nick Thimmesch
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To: Registered
He won the popular vote.

Oh sure... you can make a clone and he can win the popular vote.... but make him float on his back and sing a song and then you've really got something!
5 posted on 12/30/2002 12:23:34 PM PST by Maurice Tift
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To: Registered
This would never happen.

Who in their right mind would want to 'Party Naked' with Al as their leader?

6 posted on 12/30/2002 12:24:22 PM PST by Gritty
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To: Registered
Thanks!

This answers the all important ethical question of whether or not a clone has a soul.

7 posted on 12/30/2002 12:25:50 PM PST by N. Theknow
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To: Gritty


8 posted on 12/30/2002 12:26:35 PM PST by Registered
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To: N. Theknow
" You shall teach your child that the bad we do to others cannot be repaired by confession nor absolution once it is done, and that one should not believe that it is enough to believe in a god or in the Elohim once death approaches to have the right to eternal life ."

Rael


9 posted on 12/30/2002 12:29:58 PM PST by Scythian
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To: Registered

Raëlians (Raelians)

Claude VorilhonThe Raëlians are UFO-cult members who follow Claude Vorilhon, a Frenchman and former motor sport journalist and race-car driver who calls himself Raël. He claims that on December 13, 1973, he was in a volcano near Clermont-Ferrand, France, when he saw a UFO "7 meters in diameter made of a very shiny silver metal and moving in a total silence." He says a radiant being emerged and entrusted him with a message revealing the true origin of mankind. They told him that henceforth he would be known as Raël, which means "messenger."

His followers consider him to be "the prophet of the third millennium." Like all good religious leaders, Raël expects his followers to support him. A 10% tithe is the norm. 

He explains his mission in his book, The True Face of God. According to Taras Grescoe of Salon.com, Vorilhon claims that

he was taken to the planet of the Elohim in a flying saucer in 1975, where he was introduced to noted earthlings such as Jesus, Buddha, Joseph Smith and Confucius. The Elohim, small human-shaped beings with pale green skin and almond eyes, were apparently the original inspiration for the Judeo-Christian God. They informed Vorilhon that he was the final prophet -- sent to relay a message of peace and sensual meditation to humankind under his new name of Raël -- before the Elohim would return to Jerusalem in 2025.

Raël claims that the Elohim have taught him that the human race was created from the DNA of aliens some 25,000 years ago. (In fact, all life on earth was created in alien laboratories.) Among other things, Raël has also learned that cloning is the way to immortality and there is no God or soul. According to Raël, our alien creators want us to be beautiful and sexy and enjoy a sensuous life, free from the restrictions of traditional Judeo-Christian morality.

According to Grescoe, "Raël's success seems to derive from providing a structured environment for decadent behavior: He offers a no-guilt playground for hedonism and sexual experimentation." Fortunately, the Raëlians are big on using condoms. They won't spread as much disease that way. However, using condoms won't suffice to deplete their numbers, Raël believes, since he has formed a cloning company called Clonaid which promises to

provide assistance to would be parents willing to have a child cloned from one of them. This service offers a fantastic opportunity to parents with fertility problems or homosexual couples to have a child cloned from one of them.

Scientists say that there is no possibility of Clonaid actually working in the near future and dismiss its goals as pure fantasy (Cohen). However, Clonaid should be a reminder of what might happen in the distant future if controls on genetic engineering are not developed to prevent religious fanatics and lunatics from gaining more control of the planet than they already have.

The Raëlian headquarters are in Montreal but the cult is international and claims to have some 50,000 members in 85 countries. They have an "Evidence Page" on their Web site where they offer proof of their prophet's claims, thus relieving us of the burden of having to believe on pure faith. Unfortunately, the evidence provided is likely to satisfy only those eager for delusion and self-deception. For example, the historical evidence is of the type Velikovsky, von Daniken and other mytho-historians have provided: they take ancient legends, stories, and religious texts, and fit them into their preconceived theory. The Raëlians also consider UFO sightings as proof of their messenger's claims.

Their attempt at "scientific" evidence will have some appeal to the scientifically illiterate and the logically-challenged. The scientific evidence is nothing more than speculation and assumption in juxtaposition to facts. Their evidence consists of claiming that we are about to create life in our laboratories and our creations will probably think we are gods. Therefore, it is reasonable to conclude that we were created in laboratories and think of our creators as gods. The rest of the "scientific" evidence consists of a list of scientific accomplishments which, I suppose, are imagined to have to have occurred elsewhere before the living things on our planet could have been created in the lab. All of which begs the question as to whether this occurred elsewhere 25,000 years ago.

Apparently, the Raëlians are not bothered by the rather absurd image of a race of superior beings working for thousands of years in a laboratory to create all our insects, fungi, bacteria, viruses, etc., not to mention all their lovelies that have gone extinct. Why would any beings do such a thing? And why would they wait 25,000 years to reveal their handiwork to a French race car driver who spots their UFO in a volcano? And then tell him that the message is to clone ourselves so we can be immortal. Then again, is this story any stranger than the ones in the Bible?

The kicker in their argument is their proof that evolution could not have occurred. They claim scientists have discovered that genes have a DNA repair mechanism (p53) which prevents mutation, an important process in evolution. Species couldn't have diversified if this mechanism were present. p53 was at first thought to be an oncogene but is now thought to be anti-oncogenic. It is of little interest to the Raëlians, I suppose, that p53 itself mutates. And it is pure speculation on their part that the entire genetic code of all species always consists of genes which prevent mutation from occurring. Even if they're right, however, it wouldn't follow that Vorilhon's preposterous UFO tale is true. Just ask the so-called creation scientists, the Scientologists, the Urantians, the followers of Barbara Marciniak or UFO Billy, the remaining members of Heaven's Gate, or the surviving members of other UFO religions.

Anyway, if the Raëlians are right, I am looking forward to asking the Elohim why they created the mosquito. In the meantime, I may take up Raël's offer of $2,000 to anyone who starts a new religion.

See related entries on cults, Pleiadians, and  ETs & UFOs.

further reading

reader comments


10 posted on 12/30/2002 12:38:16 PM PST by Scythian
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To: Registered
You've got a point there, Registered.

Certainly, blitzed-out bimbos prefer to party with Al when he's wearing a sweat-stained shirt and Brooks Brothers tie instead of his nothings.

But my guess is, if he removed his formal coverings, they'd empty the Hall!

11 posted on 12/30/2002 12:38:45 PM PST by Gritty
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To: Scythian
"Claude VorilhonThe Raëlians are UFO-cult members who follow Claude Vorilhon, a Frenchman and former motor sport journalist and race-car driver who calls himself Raël. He claims that on December 13, 1973, he was in a volcano near Clermont-Ferrand, France, when he saw a UFO "7 meters in diameter made of a very shiny silver metal and moving in a total silence." He says a radiant being emerged and entrusted him with a message revealing the true origin of mankind. They told him that henceforth he would be known as Raël, which means "messenger.""

This occurred immediately after a hit on LSD that was just f'in fantastic...I think!

12 posted on 12/30/2002 12:42:56 PM PST by lawdude
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To: Gritty
Can you imagine the stench around Gore in that pic? Eeeewww.
13 posted on 12/30/2002 12:43:16 PM PST by Registered
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To: Registered
Gore
chamberlain
Gore is doing his Rchard Chamberlain impersonation.
14 posted on 12/30/2002 1:18:32 PM PST by Consort
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To: Registered
Wonder if they got their name from this Genesis classic...

The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway.

And the lamb lies down on Broadway.

Early morning Manhattan,
Ocean winds blow on the land.
Movie-Palaces now undone,
The all-night watchmen have had their fun.
Sleeping cheaply on the midnight show,
Its the same old ending-time to go.
Get out!
It seems they cannot leave their dream.
There's something moving in the sidewalk steam,
And the lamb lies down on Broadway.

Night-time's flyers feel their pairs.
Drugstore take down the chains.
Metal motion comes in bursts,
But the gas station can quench that thirst.
Suspension 'racked on unmade road
The truckers eyes read "Overload"
And out of the subway.
Rael Imperial Aerosol Kid
Exits into daylight, spraygun hid,
And the lamb lies down on Broadway.

The lamb seems right out of place,
Yet the Broadway street scene finds a focus in its face.
Somehow its lying there,
Brings a stillness to the air.
Though man-made light, at night is very bright,
There's no whitewash victim,
As the neon, dim, to the coat of white.
Rael Imperial Aerosol Kid
Wipes his gun - he's forgotten what he did,
And the lamb lies down on Broadway.

Suzanne tired, her work all done,
Thinks money-honey - be on neon
Cabman's velvet glove sounds the horn
And the sawdust king spits out his scorn.
Wonder women you can draw your blind!
Don't look at me! I'm not your kind.
I'm Rael!
Something inside me has just begun,
Lord knows what I have done,
And the lamb lies down on Broadway.
On Broadway
They say the lights are always bright on Broadway.
They say there's always magic in the air.
They say the lights are always bright on Broadway.



[Interpretations: (i) It doesn't take a great leap in logic to connect the hidden spraygun with a sexual reference, especially given that Peter Gabriel is the author. The reference to Rael "wiping his gun" and "forgetting what he did" in the middle of the song could have any number of meanings, some more sinister than others, (ii) It similarly doesn't take a great leap in logic to connect the lamb with a emissary from another plane of existence, alerting Rael of the fate which soon awaits him,
15 posted on 12/30/2002 1:24:02 PM PST by copycat
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To: Scythian
According to Raël, our alien creators want us to be beautiful and sexy and enjoy a sensuous life, free from the restrictions of traditional Judeo-Christian morality.<-- I have read a few stories about these nuts, and they are always saying there is no God, no soul. And he is always bashing the Judeo-Christian mindset. Sounds like a satanic deception to me.
16 posted on 12/30/2002 1:24:53 PM PST by Delbert
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To: Registered
"ONE OF US. ONE OF US. ONE OF US. ONE OF US."
17 posted on 12/30/2002 1:28:35 PM PST by Big Guy and Rusty 99
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To: Registered
Do you realize how dull life would be if we didn't have kooks in our midst to lighten things up a bit?


18 posted on 12/30/2002 3:06:55 PM PST by Luna
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To: Registered
Do you realize how dull life would be if we didn't have kooks in our midst to lighten things up a bit?


19 posted on 12/30/2002 3:07:27 PM PST by Luna
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To: Luna
Wow!! I cloned my reply!!! Call a press conference!!!
20 posted on 12/30/2002 3:08:53 PM PST by Luna
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