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In the pre-Thanksgiving rush, we have received an early weather
report from our in-house weather reporters. This is one, you should
be sure to email your Mom. Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then
warm in the oven to an afternoon high near 190F. The kitchen will
turn hot and humid, and if you bother the cook, be ready for a severe
squall or cold shoulder.

During the late afternoon and evening, the cold front of a knife
will slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of one to
two inches on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side
while cranberry sauce creates slippery spots on the other. Please
pass the gravy.

A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the
entire area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway. During
the evening, the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers,
dropping to a low of 34F in the refrigerator.

Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high pressure to eat sandwiches
will be established. Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days
with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late in the day. We expect
a warming trend where soup develops. By early next week, eating
pressure will be low as the only wish left will be the bone.