Posted on 10/17/2002 8:47:20 AM PDT by Rodney King
Court told of sex with traffic cone
AMY DEVINE
A MAN rolled about on the ground having sex with a traffic cone as stunned
youths watched in disbelief, a court heard yesterday.
Ross Watt, 33, had sex with the bollard only because he couldn’t get his hands on his favoured sex object - a pair of trainers. Watt had gone round teenager drivers gathered at an Edinburgh beauty spot asking if they would sell him their trainers.
But when they refused he turned his attention to the orange and white traffic cone and simulated sex with it. Watt was egged on by the crowd who shouted encouragement, urging him to "give it some".
Charles Robertson, 23, a mechanic, was one of about a dozen youths present on Calton Hill, when Watt made his bizarre request. Mr Robertson told Edinburgh Sheriff Court: "He first came along and spoke to us when we were in our cars.
"He approached us and asked if we had any shoes or trainers for sale. He was going from car to car asking this."
Watt, of Robertson Court, Edinburgh, then started rubbing his genitals up and down the traffic cone.
He said the incident carried on for about 15 or 20 minutes. Police were alerted to the late night incident on 3 September at Calton Hill and arrived to find Watt replacing a traffic cone by a gatepost just yards from the Scottish Executive’s St Andrew’s House.
His defence lawyer, Andy Gilbertson, suggested to Sheriff Mhairi Stephen that if his client had been performing at an Edinburgh Festival Fringe show and people were egging him on that it would have been acceptable, but then retracted his opinion.
Watt was found guilty of acting in a disorderly manner by simulating sexual intercourse with a traffic cone and placing members of the public in a state of fear and alarm on 3 September at Calton Hill and committing a breach of the peace.
Sheriff Stephen: "I take the view that the unpleasant and disgusting character of your behaviour that evening in a public area is behaviour that amounts to a breach of the peace."
Sentence was deferred for four weeks until reports are prepared.
Not that crazy.
It depends on the size of the perch..........
Since when is 23 a youth?
I think about the time one turns fifty.
You'd have to ask Arlan Spector, the world's leading authority on Scottish law.
memo to self: buy a dictation machine like Norm McDonald's
PS: Thanks for the attribution to Mr. McDonald, I should have given him credit. He deserves all the credit he can get, especially since the Norm show was cancelled, he does not have as much cash as he used to.
A girl is "Coyote Ugly" if, when you wake up and she's lying on your arm, you'd rather gnaw your own arm off rather than take the chance of waking her up when you pull it out from under her.
There's also double Coyote Ugly, which is where you gnaw off your other arm, too, to remind yourself never to do that again.
Hard to believe the lawyer actually wised up a bit.
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