Posted on 07/07/2002 1:12:50 PM PDT by Ol'Grey Head
Editorial, Humor: IF YOU CAN’T POST THIS THEN THERE IS NO FREEDOM OF SPEECH
In a surprise press conference the FBI announced that since Hesham Mohamed Hadayet was found to not have terror ties, that they must reluctantly extend the non-terrorist designation to the white man, Timothy McVeigh. The recategorization of MeVeigh was forced on the FBI and its associate, the news media, in response to a suit brought by the NtripleACP on behalf of the McVeigh family. NtripleACP spokesperson, the Rev. Jessie, declared that the suit was initiated to promote the NtripleACP’s newly adopted founding principle that all people, including white people, must receive equal treatment under the law.
However, undisclosed sources within the Jessie organization, informed that the high profile McVeigh case is intended to attract a new market for their equality racketeering product. The dumbing down of the public education system, coupled with intense diversity training, has created a whole new market among young white liberals to be easily duped.
The unidentified source also state that the Rev. Jessie came up with the idea himself from observing young white males with navy stocking caps pulled down to their eyebrows while listening to rap music coming from over-amped boom boxes. “The m—f—ing nigels (word substitution used to avoid hate thought crime recriminations) has become too jaded to buy into our song and dance. But due to the public education system, white liberals have become the most gullible people on the face of the earth. And they have money! A prefect place to open a new market.”
The Rev. Jessie did not use the word “Nigel”, but did use the N word itself, however, being black this exempts him from repercussions, such as losing his job, being ostracized, etc. The Rev. Jessie, nor sources within his organization would describe how the NtripleACP would handle this inequity effecting their new market, but they feel certain it will be profitable.
When asked to reveal their strategy they implied two possibilities:
They could insist that blacks using the N word be treated the same as whites, i.e. they be loosen their jobs, too.
Or they could they take the radical approach and insist that freedom of speech requires that no organization intimidate, impose penalties or infringe on a persons rights and privileges because that person’s use of language, even distasteful language.
Threats of violence whether spoken generically about a group, or directed toward an individual are assault and are punishable under current law, unless the words are spoken in an Islamic temple or religious school. Since Islam is THE religion of piece (so declared and adopted by the proponents of world social order); a piece of a Jew here, a piece of a Christian country there. A piece of a Christian here, and piece of a Jewish country there.
This reporter pointed out that a few white boys drive around in beat cars with their boom boxes going, but the NtripleACP would have to appeal to the larger white liberal population. Our mysterious spokesperson laughed and replied that thanks to the educational system whites don’t know anything about their history anyway. “It would be simple to do a little colorization like the post office did in their representation of the flag raising over the World Trade Center. I mean if the US government can misrepresent history why can’t we?”
“You mean go into the history books and colorize General Lee as a black? And make field slaves into whites? “
“No,” he laughed, “that would be too difficult. Besides nobody reads history books to get history any more. We could just buy the rights to “Gone with the Wind” and colorize that. It’s already been colorized once. It was just done wrong.”
“You mean turn Scarlet and Clark Gable black? “ I gasped. Somehow it seemed more bold than turning Lee black. But of course I was educated in public schools too; howbeit before history was turned over completely to the film industry.
“And big momma, white.” He added.
I had to admit it was a clever scheme, and would likely work, being that the public school history teachers also learn their history from movies. And those who know better would end up having to take diversity training until they either went insane or acquiesce.
Specking of clever. The case for Timothy McVeigh was cleverly founded on the fact that Hesham Mohamed Hadayet (hereafter termed Elhambra) was declared to not have engaged in terror, when he, an Arab, gunned down people in front of the Jewish airlines. People may have been terrorized, particularly the ones who died or had a family member die. But he could not have been a Terrorist because the FBI had no record of him associating with an official US State Department certified terrorist organization. In searching his pockets they could not find a membership card to a terrorist organization, hence he could not be a terrorist. Of course, the FBI is legendary for their thorough investigative research, and insightful and logic analysis, and decisive action, … but those guys are have retired or are dead.
How would it be possible for a devotee of the adopted religion of peace to conduct an act of terror. Even if the people who were there said they were terrorized, they weren’t. He could not acting alone, commit a terrorist act, according to the FBI manual, unless he is a white guy. Consequently it must be something else…. Say… he was despondent. It might be reclassified as hate, though. Particularly if the Jews push the State Department far enough, then a politically compromised determination regarding the very important matter of the state of his mind might be ruled.
Maybe he had hate. Terror apparently is something like Satan, omnipresent, and hate is more individualized. And therein lies the case for Mr. McVeigh. If an Arab cannot conduct terror without a certified association with a terrorist organization, then neither can a white man. At least so claimed the NtripleACP legal team.
Digressing for a moment, white is the combination of all the colors together, therefore NtripleACP is perfectly titled to represent the oppressed white descendents of “Gone with the Wind” colorized slaves. This I must admit is a marketing ploy I thought up and offered my helpful contact. He thanked me, and complimented that I must have graduated from high school prior to 1980.
The FBI futilely argued that McVeigh was not totally single handed. He had help of one or two others. NtripleACP countered that one or two others cannot be construed to be a terrorist organization. Besides as far as we know Elhambra’s wife or brother may have loaded his guns and packed his lunch for him.
FBI then suggested the shear magnitude of the Oklahoma City bombing required that McVeigh be a terrorist. This ploy works well in comic books and movies and therefore was a significant challenge to the NtripleACP, since, as we recall, the majority of the public rely on these sources for facts and situational analysis.
However, ever clever, the NtripleACP lawyers pointed out that a couple of white guys are capable of mentally conceiving and building a weapon of mass destruction, where an Arab might only think of a primitive bang bang gun. The difference is genetic and therefore constitutes racial profiling. Which is forbidden under the law, even for white guys, declared the NtripleACP.
The FBI then made their final effort and attempted to declare McVeigh to have had hate. If he were not part of the big Satan, Terror, then he must have been at least possessed by the demonic spirit, Hate. They argued that he killed many more blacks than the most vicious KKK members did in their hay day. The NtripleACP countered that he killed even more whites and people of other races, consequently it could not be a hate crime. So in the end, McVeigh, like Elhambra, was found simply to be despondent.
The NtripleACP will be filing a 100 million dollar wrongful death suit against the federal government on behalf of the McVeigh family. The Federal prosecutor who tried McVeigh was dismissed for his incompetent lack of foresight in failing to drop the murder charges for the deaths of the white people, and only charging for the deaths of the blacks thereby creating the condition where the more severe penalty for hate crime would apply. He is now researching his case against the Federal government for enacting hate crime legislation which places a lower value on the life of a white person.
The NtripleACP is collaborating with him on this, and according to my source, will demonstrate the endemic nature of this discrimination, by revealing their newly acquired historical document where Clark Gable replies, “Frankly, I don’t give a damn,” in response to Scarlet’s inquiry about the slaves less than adequate quarters. By the way there is an ugly rumor that Scarlet was fathered by a white slave.
NtripleACP spokesperson, the Rev. Jessie, declared that the suit was initiated to promote the NtripleACP’s newly adopted founding principle that all people, including white people, must receive equal treatment under the law.*************************
Truth is just as strange as fiction, Ol'Grey Head.
From United Press International :
"...After facing pressure from the United States and Israel, Arafat announced on May 15 that he intended to carry out reforms into the civil and security institutions of the Authority, as well as holding parliamentary and presidential elections by the beginning of next year.
Al Daghma, appointed by Arafat to be the new minister of Justice, said :
"This constitution fits for the Palestinian authority, and once an independent democratic state is established, there will be a new permanent constitution..."
To replace the old permanent constutition, I guess.
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