[savedbygrace]

Sounds like Melvin was the one who called into tech support years ago complaining that his word processor program wouldn't work, and after a long series of questions, finally said, "We're having a power outage here right now." To which the tech dude said, "Ah, now I know how to solve your problem. Pack up all the parts to that computer, take them all to UPS, and ship them back to us, because you're too XXXXXXX stupid to own a computer!"

Word is, that tech got fired. IIRC, he was with WordPerfect, back when WP was a very good software company.

[Tennessee_Bob]

I can tell you some "true tales of tech support." Worked laptop/desktop support for a major manufacturer for 2.5 years.

The guy who wanted to make sure his laptop was ok after the house got struck by lighting. He was using it, during the thunderstorm, with no AC power or telephone/network cables connected, sitting on a chair in the middle of the room, playing solitaire while the storm raged on. "Sir, you weren't connected to AC or any wall outlets, your machine should be fine. How can I tell? Well, it's running right now, correct??"

The tiger that knocked a laptop off the end table.

The woman in high heels, a hardwood floor, and a portable computer on the other side of the room. She made four trips to the machine before I suggested that she bring it over to the phone.

The naked woman.

The Italian couple who would argue with each other (they both had telephone receivers) in Italian (my own little opera) for five minutes, then talk to me, then start arguing again.

Ahh - the good old days