DFU SONG: If You're Going to San Francisco (scumbag Stanley Hilton song) 5-26-02

DFU SONG PARODIES ^ | 5-2002 | Lyrics, Doug from Upland

[doug from upland]

MIDI - IF YOU'RE GOING TO SAN FRANCISCO -- 2nd column, 6th down

If you're going to San Francisco
Make sure you go see Stanley Hilton there
Drop by his office in San Francisco
Tell him his mom deserves some better care

He had been charged in San Francisco
He walked 'cause of technicalities
Those who have known him in San Francisco
Say that Stanley is quite a low-life sleaze

He's a real Bush hater…this could not be greater
Oh, yes…he is a scumbag
He's the latest RAT hitman…he is so full of it, man
Oh, yes…Stanley's a scumbag…Stanley's a scumbag

So if you should go to San Francisco
Tell Stanley that he doesn't have a soul
Pass one more message in San Francisco
That his mom should have used birth control

Go tell Stan in San Francisco
Too bad his mom had not used birth control

[doug from upland]

DRUDGE STORY.

[Bogey78O]

Have you thought of making a parody of "Soak up the Sun" by Sheryl Crow? Maybe retitle it "Grab all the Guns"?

"Soak Up the Sun"
C'Mon, C'Mon
Written by Sheryl Crow & Jeff Trott

My friend the communist
Holds meetings in his RV
I can't afford his gas
So I'm stuck here watching tv
I don't have digital
I don't have diddly squat
It's not having what you want
It's wanting what you've got

I'm gonna soak up the sun
I'm gonna tell everyone
To lighten up (I'm gonna tell 'em that)
I've got no one to blame
For every time I feel lame
I'm looking up
I'm gonna soak up the sun
I'm gonna soak up the sun

I've got a crummy job
It don't pay near enough
To buy the things it takes
To win me some of your love
Every time I turn around
I'm looking up, you're looking down
Maybe something's wrong with you
That makes you act the way you do

I'm gonna soak up the sun
I'm gonna tell everyone
To lighten up (I'm gonna tell 'em that)
I've got no one to blame
For every time I feel lame
I'm looking up
I'm gonna soak up the sun
I'm gonna soak up the sun

I'm gonna soak up the sun
While it's still free
I'm gonna soak up the sun
Before it goes out on me

Don't have no master suite
I'm still the king of me
You have a fancy ride, but baby
I'm the one who has the key
Every time I turn around
I'm looking up, you're looking down
Maybe something's wrong with you
That makes you act the way you do
Maybe I am crazy too

I'm gonna soak up the sun
I'm gonna tell everyone
To lighten up (I'm gonna tell 'em that)
I've got no one to blame
For every time I feel lame
I'm looking up
I'm gonna soak up the sun
I'm gonna soak up the sun

I'm gonna soak up the sun
Got my 45 on
So I can rock on

[doug from upland]

I don't know the song and hadn't thought of that one. I've written a few pro-gun songs and I'll go find some links for you.

[Bogey78O]

Ok, thanks. The first time I heard the song I just found myself singing it that way.

[doug from upland]

This list should keep you busy.

ONE TIN SOLDIER

GOLDFINGER

CAT SCRATCH FEVER

CRACKLIN' ROSIE

SLOOP JOHN B

MASSACHUSETTS

GREEN BERETS

TEDDY BEARS PICNIC

SCHOOL DAYS

MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB

LODI

CRYING

FLASHDANCE

TELL LAURA I LOVE HER

CALIFORNIA HERE I COME

[friendly]

Just to prove that he is a typical DNC stooge democrat and typical utterly vile trial lawyer, Stanley Hilton was up on charges of felony elder abuse charges a few years ago.

For abuse of his Alzheimer's disease afflicted mother.

[doug from upland]

Whoops, I forgot I AM WOMAN.

[doug from upland]

Yep, that's why I wrote this for him.

[doug from upland]

The scumbag is on Drudge right now.

[gonzo]

Howdy pard! Looooooong repair job here! Geez, it woulda been easier to burn it, but I don't know any Italians!

Stay well and vigilant, pal............FRegards

[Johnny Gage]

This retard is on Michael Medved now, doing his best to attempt to justify his $49 Billion
lawsuit against the Gov't for directly CAUSING 9/11/01.

This guy is a lunatic. Medved keeps referring to it as "your cockamamie plan"
This Nut case deserves a high-colonic enema and a 20 mile mountain hike with a 100lb pack.

[doug from upland]

The RAT is doing this as payback for going after the real crimes of the Sinkmaster.

[Parody]

Well, I've been wanting to see a few pro-gun songs, so when I saw your suggestion, I went ahead and wrote this little gem...

Grab All The Guns

My friends are Commie nuts;
My friends are Nazi swine.
It's not that I'm a thief;
Just that what's yours is mine.

I don't have common sense;
I don't have half a brain.
I don't like self defense
Because I'm quite insane.

I'm gonna gonna grab all the guns
I'm gonna take everyone's means of defense
(From their own governments).
I say everyone is to blame;
A gun owner's the same as a criminal.
I'm gonna grab all the guns!
Gonna grab all the guns...

I'm making crummy pay;
Must be the taxpayers' fault.
I'll take their guns away;
Then I'll make my assault.

Some guy just fired off a round;
What the hell's with this town?
If I try to mug someone,
That somebody pulls a gun!

I'm gonna grab all the guns;
I'm gonna take everyone's means of defense.
(Where's my lawyer, ‘cause)
I've got someone to blame
For every time I go lame from getting shot.

I'm gonna grab all the guns;
From now on, jewelry is free.
I'm gonna grab all the guns
So no one has them but me.

Ain't got no great respect
For rights to property.
You've got amendment rights; (but so what?)
Your guns belong to me!
Judge decided to dismiss?
Tell me, what the hell is this?
Now I'm mad, I'm gonna sue;
Gonna sue gun-makers too;
After that, I'm suing you!

I'm gonna grab all the guns;
I'm gonna take everyone's means of defense
(‘Cause I'm a Socialist)
I'll sue you all just the same
And make you all take the blame just ‘cause you've got guns.

But I couldn't grab all the guns...
I've got my straight-jacket on
And I've been locked up...