Careers are 'making women miserable'

Daily Telegraph ^ | April 25, 2002 | Paul Stokes

[Korth]

WOMEN have become unhappier as a result of concentrating more on their careers than the family role they once fulfilled, an academic claims in a new book.

Prof James Tooley believes the feminist revolution of the 1960s and 1970s brought about huge changes in attitudes which have not be conducive to motherhood.

In his book, The Miseducation of Women, published next month, he suggests many professional woman would have been more contented by staying at home and bringing up children.

He draws comparisons with the film character Bridget Jones, a love-hungry young woman in publishing who becomes a television presenter and craves a stable relationship rather than being left "a singleton".

Prof Tooley, professor of education policy at Newcastle University, considers that the role of housewife has been "desperately undervalued" in society.

He argues that schools should allow girls to concentrate on the arts and domestic science rather than being pushed towards subjects such as engineering and computer science in an attempt at sexual equality.

Prof Tooley, 42, who is single with no children, said yesterday: "The Bridget Jones effect is growing in society. Women find themselves successful in their careers and unhappy in their lives.

Domesticity has been degraded over the year, particularly by feminists in the 1970s who used the phrases 'parasite' and `leach' to describe the housewife.

"I expect career women will react very strongly against me and to even suggest women would be happier in the home has become almost a taboo. We need to cull a few sacred cows and start a debate on the subject. That is what I am trying to do."

He describes his book as "largely a think piece", based on a study of more than 100,000 men and women in Britain and America by the National Bureau of Economic Research.

Its findings led him to examine the way the education system was shaping the way women lead their lives.

Among his assertions are that women who were pushed into science as pupils and embarked on careers such as law and accountancy are unhappy by the time they reach 30.

Prof Tooley, from Rothbury, Northumblerland, said: "I'm not suggesting we ban girls from the labs, but my research shows that 30 per cent of young women are unhappier with their lives than previous generations were, while young men now seem happier than previous generations were."

Prof Tooley believes the "Bridget Jones generation" was spawned by the feminist revolution.

"Feminists went right to what they thought was the root of the problem. They looked at schooling to change the situation. The Sex Discrimination Act of 1975 and the introduction of the National Curriculum in 1988 are, in a way, products of that, and they've transformed what is taught in school.

"But this means that the curriculum is now designed according to the feminist idea that girls should be following the model that was set down for boys. That is, pursuing a career at the expense of all other things.

"I suggest that this is pushing girls in a direction they don't want to take and there's a whole generation of working women who don't want to be there."

[Korth]

FYI

[Mahone]

Isn't it just breathtaking that they have just 'gotten' the obvious? What next? Their noses?

[ImaGraftedBranch]

My wife is at home and 100% happy. I know, because I'm not happy unless she is happy, and I am HAPPY!

[A Ruckus of Dogs]

He argues that schools should allow girls to concentrate on the arts and domestic science rather than being pushed towards subjects such as engineering and computer science

Women should learn something they can make a living at. There are no guarantees in life.

[corkoman]

I am happy for you. My wife is a successful real-estate broker and miserable. Funny thing about miserable women - they need to tranfer their misery onto those close to them. I am not a happy man. But I liked reading about you - thanks for sharing.

[hawaiian]

DUH!!!!!!!

[galt-jw]

liberalism has risen and now disintegrates in less than sixty years.

[mewzilla]

It's not what you do, rather why you're doing it and how you deal with it. And anyone who thinks they can have it all is nuts. Actually, this is probably where the problem lies. They bought into all that feminist crap about having it all, and just discovered the real world doesn't work that way. Awwwwww.

[ikanakattara]

He argues that schools should allow girls to concentrate on the arts and domestic science rather than being pushed towards subjects such as engineering and computer science in an attempt at sexual equality.

He is a maroon. I went to engineering school AND met my dh there. The college I went to had about 25% women engineering students. I can't speak for everyone, of course, but among the women I knew and kept up with, virtually *everyone* got married, and their marriages have *lasted.* Most of these women aren't staying home, but a good portion are.

Perhaps it's different in the UK, but women here meet their husbands *in college.* Confining oneself to the female "ghetto" either academically or professionally is a good way to guarantee singleness. Girls who want to meet and marry the boys need to go *where the boys are,* and it's not in home ec, interior design, or cosmetology.

[olivia3boys]

I have two young children (w/ one on the way) and have found what I consider perfect balance: a part-time job (right now I work two 10 hour days but will switch to five 4 hour days when they are all in school). I am blessed with extended family to help out with childcare. I don't know why more women don't work part-time. I get away from the kids for a while, I make enough so we can send our kids to private schools (no government schools for our kids, especially as we live in CA!), and I can get "career fulfillment" while still remaining primarily a a stay-at-home mom (as I'm with them 5 of 7 days). I think I've found perfect happiness, or the closest thing to it.

[Cowgirl]

I have been a stay at home mom for twenty years - still have an eight year old that I am home schooling. What I always hear from women that work is that they can't quit their jobs because they need the money, can't home school because they wouldn't be able to stand their kids for that long, and wouldn't know what to do at home if they were there all day. Usually these women are strung out and constantly racing the clock. It frustrates me because I know none of this is true. They can make it on one paycheck, they can stand their kids if they make them mind and there is plenty to do. There is also a big network of women who get together with other home schoolers so it isn't isolating. I really don't think they want to give up the independence of working, and take on the responsibilities of taking care of their family. It is more about the me-generation than a matter of having to work. In the long run that is why they are unhappy. You are better off giving than getting.

[Diamond]

Funny thing about miserable women - they need to tranfer their misery onto those close to them
corkoman

[Note to self]: I wonder what would happen if I put that most excellent quote on our refrigerator?

[cajungirl]

Transfering one's misery to another is hardly a female attribute. Men do it regularly, as do children. Our dog even takes out his misery on the cat.

[Mahone]

PLEASE!! Don't propogate their agenda by labeling yourself a 'stay at home Mom'! I'm sure you do a whole lot more than just 'stay at home', whenever anyone uses such a term they demean all the blessed women who are home working harder than any wage slave!

The battle begins and ends in the establishment of labels and the branding of something in people's minds, let's do all we can to fight back and let society know that making a home is a high calling!

[olivia3boys]

I don't know--I think the term "stay at home mom" is pretty descriptive and its opposite ("work outside the home mom") is too. Of course, when I'm at work I practically spend more time Freeping than working, and when I'm "home" with my kids we don't stay "home" at all (we would all drive each other crazy!) but instead spend almost all our time in parks, libraries, playgroups, etc.

[RLK]

But, with a 50+ % divorce rate they can't be dependent upon husbands for financial support and hence must have a career.

[wbill]

I thought that the whole idea of feminism was 'choice'. I would define choice as the freedom to be a professional, or a housewife, or something in-between. To have kids, or not. To get married, or not.

Instead, feminism defines choice as the CEO of this company or that. Maybe I just missed the point. Or maybe a woman who is 'just' a housewife doesn't further their agenda.

Speaking purely for myself, I think the reason that both my wife and myself turned out as successful as we have is because both of our mothers stayed home with us until we were 8 or 9. I'd call that far and away more successful than Hillary Klinton and her feminist village.(please excuse the honking of my own horn....)

[Draco]

Report from the dating front: Don't date a lady lawyer or law student. The one I just dated took a cell phone call from her study group in the middle of a lunch date. She is "very busy" -- and so that was our last date. Too much self-absorbtion to ever be "Mom material."

[ctdonath2]

Having read "Bridget Jones' Diary" and am now reading the sequel "Bridget Jones and the Edge of Reason", and being a thirtysomething singleton myself, let me observe further that the Bridget Jones Effect has more to do with a complete lack of standards and guidance in the mating game, and career issues are simply a consequence thereof. Reflecting the modern realities of never-married life, the books & movie referred to observe the amusing & tragic consequences of everyone practically making up the rules (in accordance with PC principles) as they go along: violating almost every social guideline of every well-developed culture and religion, singletons pin their hopes on unviable relationships, suffer the consequences, get p!ssed off by a seemingly unending stream of what Bridget so eloquently & frequently deemed "f***wits", and generally have little choice but to find solace in the one thing resembling stability - career.

[moyden]

If the wife ain't happy, nobody is happy.