SHAKES-QUEER? New Evidence Emerges to Prove William Shakespeare may be Gay

Ananova Breaking News Wire and the London Daily Sun ^ | Monday, April 22, 2002 00:14 GMT | What Tomorrow's Newspapers Say Staff

[codebreaker]

Ananova Breaking Wire-

What the Papers Say-The London Daily Sun

SHAKESQUEER

Me thinks new evidence has emerged that doth suggest William Shakespeare might have been gay.

I RULE

Tony Blair delivered an astonishing slapdown to Gordon Brown yesterday by stressing that Britain had elected him to run the country not the chancellor

Story Filed: 00:14 Monday, April 22, 2002 Greenwich Mean Time

[Byron_the_Aussie]

...there are reasons for thinking that Shakespeare was what we would now call bisexual. This was not a concept that existed in Shakespeare's day...

Huh?

What about King James I?

[Clint N. Suhks]

Evidence shows more filth and degradation posthumously bestowed upon people who can’t defend themselves. Alexander the Great, Abraham Lincoln, Aristotle, Socrates and Jesus Christ all lumped in to making the same base and repugnant behavioral choices in order to justify perversion. Sad people desperate for validation.

[Khepera]

Their goal is to make us all gay so they may get to know us.

[glorygirl]

A tale told by an idiot, signifying nothing.

[Clint N. Suhks]

Their goal is to make us all gay so they may get to know us.

And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where are the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.

[glorygirl]

"Dangling from a silver chain under his short-sleeve shirt is a medal of St. Francis of Assisi, a 12th Century playboy whose conversion began with his embrace of a leper."

Not to mention the jokes about how St. Francis shied away from fights because he was "Assisi."

[Tijeras_Slim]

A recent book "The Hidden Hitler" makes the case that der furher was queer. How come that isn't being shouted from the rooftops by the gay lobby? Never mind....

[glorygirl]

"Caesar's physical vitality perhaps partly accounts for his sexual promiscuity, which was out of the ordinary, even by contemporary Greek and Roman standards. It was rumoured that during his first visit to the East he had had homosexual relations with King Nicomedes of Bithynia. The rumour is credible, though not proved, and was repeated throughout Caesar's life."

[Doctor Stochastic]

Shakespeare? Or one of the putative authors? Marlowe? Oxford? Bacon? The guy who wrote "The Beggar's Opera"?

[DainBramage]

Monte Python's lumberjack skit!

I am Shakespear and I'm okay

I works all night and sleeps all day........

[DonQ]

This is by no means new. Someone was coming up with strange theories about whether the "dark lady" of the sonnets was a man more than 50 years ago. Considering that the facts solidly known about William Shakespeare could barely fill one typed page and include (1) he never spelled his name that way, (2) he was married, and (3) he had children, I would have my doubts about this theory.

[boris]

"There is strong evidence that Plato, Sophocles, and Pindar were homosexual, among leading Greek writers. There is reasonable evidence that Virgil was."

"Aeschylus was the oldest of the most prominent tragedy writers and is generally considered the founder of Greek drama. He was the first to use a second actor in his plays, which made dialogues possible.

"Of his best known works is the Oresteia, which is about Agamemnon's son Orestes, who revenged his father only to be persecuted by the Erinyes.

"As a young man Aeschylus had fought against the Persians at the battle of Marathon. He ended his days as an old man at the court of the Tyrant Hieron of Syracuse and died when an eagle dropped a turtle on his head."

He was bald, and the eagle mistook his pate for a nice hard rock upon which to break the turtle's shell and thus obtain a meal.

Apropos of nothing.

--Boris

[MadIvan]

Obviously from the never seen "Romeo the Lumberjack". ;)

Regards, Ivan

[Orual]

What was it Puck said?

[MadIvan]

"I never wanted to be a Montague,
"I wanted to be a LUMBERJACK!
"Leaping from tree to tree as they float down the mighty rivers outside Verona,
"The larch, the cedar, the mighty Italian Pine
"With my Julie by my side, we'd sing, sing, sing...."

You get the idea.

Regards, Ivan

[dighton]

The boring truth is this: Catherine the Great died of a stroke while sitting on the commode in the palace at St. Petersburg.

More or less. She had her fatal stroke there and was brought to bed, where she died the next day.

[dighton]

What was it Puck said?

"Captain of our fairy band ..."

[mafree]

Jesus Christ will be next.

Insinuations have been made by some gays about his relationship with St. John. Also David and Jonathan, along with Ruth and Naomi.