Airport Screener Haiku Poetry

LurkedLongEnough | April 11, 2002 | LurkedLongEnough

[csvset]

Mohammad Atta
No Smoking
Ground Zero
Barney Fife Screeners

Feel Safe
Tom Ridge
Crayola Alert Factor

[Lizavetta]

This could take hours-
Doing search on Don King's hair.
Lindberg baby found!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

[in the Arena]

He he he...a classic...

[Mike-o-Matic]

Bump! Humorous thread!
I will read this more, later,
when my workday ends.

[ibbryn]

Do not stop to ask
who attacked America.
Search the grandmothers.

[C.C. Pelican Brown]

Dark ties. White shirts worn.
Performing, well-dressed screeners.
Triple my paycheck.

[blau993]

A female Freeper heard on the radio that there was trouble at the airport. She was concerned because her husband was due to arrive there shortly. However, she could not stick with the news reports, because she was going to take a shower, and she hoped others would keep her informed. The hundreds of posts that followed were everything you might imagine and more.

If the thread has not been preserved for posterity it is a shame. If we ever decide to do a "Best of Free Republic," that thread is an absolute must.

[f.Christian]

Pajama fun flight...
politicians-teachers flight crew---
bags-weirdo cargo-run.

[C.C. Pelican Brown]

Non-alcohol flight.
But my pencil just x-rayed
No crosswords, no drinks.

[sixmil]

Got this one on the web today:

Resource Not Found

Request:    GET /asm_os/cgi/ultimatebb.cgi HTTP/1.1

Here is a random haiku, while you contemplate your next destination:
Rather than a beep,
or a rude error message,
these words: "File Not Found."

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Tuesday, April 16, 2002  16:45:46 CDT

Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 6.0; Windows 98; T312461; Q312461)

---

Apache/1.3.24 (Unix) PHP/4.1.2

Administrator: pwhite@gigacluster.net

66.32.229.19

[LurkedLongEnough]

[Xenalyte]

Ping to some FUNNY stuff! Yeah, I know it's an old thread. It still rulez.

[Rebelbase]

no more rent a cop
now federal employee
when is my next break?

[Allegra]

Take my shoes off now?
But the smell will blow you away!
Ooooops...don't take me away.....

[Xenalyte]

Since you just did the customs trick in a non-U.S.-type place, I must ask what it was like arriving in and departing from London. Hassle at all, or easy like it used to be?

Also, I heard a report on KSEV this morning that the air marshals are sticking out like sore thumbs on their flights because they're the only passengers who are "professionally dressed." Apparently, their impeccable grooming is giving them away.

[Allegra]

Getting in and out of London was a breeze. Customs barely even looked at me. Upon leaving, they did select my carry-on as one to search, but they did it politley and efficiently.

Getting out and back into Kuwait was no hassle either.

When I visit DC during the holidays via Reagan Airport, I always play "Spot the Air Marshal" when I'm boarding and it's soooooo easy!

[Xenalyte]

I didn't notice one on our Vegas flights, but they were full-on solid booked, so I probably would only have seen a marshal if he were sitting next to me.

Which wasn't the case . . . I had a child sitting next to me, and the child's family behind me, and in the lap of the family member directly behind me another child who kicked my seat the entire damn flight.

[philman_36]

It isn't much fun
Practicing proctology
As security.

[xsmommy]

aiport haiku screams your name.

[Allegra]

Which wasn't the case . . . I had a child sitting next to me, and the child's family behind me, and in the lap of the family member directly behind me another child who kicked my seat the entire damn flight.

Uh oh. You're like my ex-boyfriend/fiance. He was a screaming-kid-magnet on flights. We could be sitting at the gate ready to board a flight and there'd be ONE screaming kid in the whole lot. That kid invariably ended up sitting right behind US.

Every freakin' time.