I'm from the government -- I'm here to help you

SUBINTSOC.NET ^ | March 22, 2002 | A.K.W. Geheimbundler

[Zufall]

After the visas-for-terrorists debacle, the folks at SUBINTSOC.NET (who claim to have special access to federal computer systems) have blown the lid off half a dozen other examples of government incompetence:

"Think the recent terrorist attacks were a wake-up call for the U.S. government? Think again. Last week, the world learned that the Immigration and Naturalization Service had sent out visa-approval letters to hijackers Mohammed Atta and Marwan Al-Shehhi -- six months to the day after September 11!

"Using our special access to ARPAnet, we decided to see what other notices had been mistakenly mailed out by government agencies. We searched for any recent documents involving controversial figures like Elian Gonzalez, David Duke, Kenneth Lay, Ted 'Unabomber' Kaczynski, and others.

"The results? Prepare to be shocked. We learned that the bureacrats are still doing their best -- or their worst -- to be "helpful" in all the wrong ways... and that sometimes late is just as bad as never. "

What they "found" includes a citizenship application sent to Elian Gonzalez (c/o his Miami relatives) a month ago, a bunch of gov't. publications on explosives sent to the Unabomber, a tax exemption for the Branch Davidians (oops, a little late for that now), and other funny stuff. See it all here:

http://subintsoc.net/better_late.php

[theDentist]

"..., a tax exemption for the Branch Davidians... and other funny stuff. "

Yeah, we're all laughing about it.

[theDentist]

"I'm from the government -- I'm here to help you.

Come to think of it, the quote has been changed to:
"I'm from the government -- Mind your own damn business!"

[Zufall]

Did you even read it? Also, who is this "we" you speak for? All of "us" here would like to know.

I thought the affirmative-action letter to David Duke was especially choice.

But then again, you (singular) may not be laughing.

[theDentist]

The "we" was generic. My apologies for leaving off an indication it was sarcasm.
I thought it would have been self-evident.

[Marine Inspector]

I hope you don't really believe this crap.

Last week, the world learned that the Immigration and Naturalization Service had sent out visa-approval letters to hijackers Mohammed Atta and Marwan Al-Shehhi -- six months to the day after September 11!

The INS did not send out visa approval letters. The letters that were sent out to the flight school, were the schools copy of the I-20‘s. The visa's were approved back in July.

As for the rest of the fake docs they present; take of the tin foil hat and rejoin reality.

[blondee123]

The INS needs a total house cleaning in MHO! Another corrupt goverment agency!

[Zufall]

Dentist:

Sarcasm was noted. When I said "funny stuff" I was, obviously, speaking for myself. Your mileage, obviously, varies.

Marine Inspector:

My hat is aluminum, not tin, thank you. See zapatopi.net for full details.

OF COURSE it's a joke, dude. That's why it's posted under "Political Humor/Cartoons." Next time I'll include huge blinking red text that says "THIS IS A JOKE."

(By the way, that was a joke too.)

Blondee123:

The INS is indeed a mess... it doesn't know what its mission is or even which end is up. Most of the agencies parodied in this piece are the same way... it's a problem which transcends Republican or Democratic administrations at this point.

See the Washington Monthly article posted earlier about Judge Lamberth -- he's going after Gale Norton and the Dept. of Interior, but the suit has been dragging on since the Clinton era, and it deals with a bureacratic problem that dates to 1887 (criminal mismanagement and corruption in the Bureau of Indian Affairs).

[Joe Boucher]

The 1st time I took a flight to decide if I should get a pilots licence, I went with a flight instructor from Stuart airport to Indiantown airport in southeast Florida. On the wall of the Indiantown airport was a poster that said "the 10 biggest lies you'll hear in flying,#1, Hi I'm from the F.A.A. and I'm here to help you." I about died laughing. I did get that pilots licence but nearly everyone involved in flying that I have ever spoken to think the F.A.A. and its employees are pathetic. Less then helpful, more in line with being a detriment.

[Marine Inspector]

With the new look of the forum, I missed that it was posted under "Political Humor/Cartoons."

Sorry my bust.