New Star Wars Trailer!

Apple ^ | 3/11/2002 | Me

[ArcLight]

Man oh man!

[ArcLight]

Wow! Looks like some serious interstellar booty gets kicked this time 'round! I can hardly wait!

[ShadowAce]

bump for viewing at home

[KC_Conspirator]

I can't link. I hope this was better than the last movie.

[dead]

I saw the trailer in the theater a few weeks ago.

More Jar-Jar, more totally fake-looking computer graphics, plus cameos by the N'Sync boys.

Oooofah. Train wreck coming to a theater near you.

[Dimensio]

From what I've heard, N'Synch won't be appearing in the film because of fan outcry following the original announcement.

Considering that their characters were all going to be killed, I think that it's a shame and demonstrates the ignorance of those who whined and cried about it in the first place.

[NativeNewYorker]

This is a different trailer. I didn't see Jar-Jar or N'sync.

Lots of testosterone eye candy.

Best line: "I hate it when he does that."

[ArcLight]

Jar-Jar? He's not in this trailer, thank God. The guy who sponsored Anakin's pod racer is back, though.

[ArcLight]

I never heard this about N'Sync. Are you for real? What a wretched idea! Thank heaven it was abandoned.

[butter pecan fan]

WARNING: MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD!

Star Wars, Episode II:

In Star Wars, Episode II, young Anakin Skywalker, having seen firsthand the damage that Light Sabers and Blasters can do, is swept into the orbit of two Bangunthian anti-violence crusaders of growing prominence in the Galaxy, Scarba Braethi and Hellara Clinggon. These two form a powerful alliance with an Imam of the Shriltong sect, Huffi Grabsome. The Imam Grabsome, a media darling who already enjoys planet-wide recognition on Leftopia because of the work of his charitable foundation Operation PLUSH, is propelled to interplanetary fame when a best-selling holo-book, "Sheikhtown," vividly recounts his life story and struggles.

Backed by Huffi Grabsome, Clinggon cuts a deal with the charismatic but evil Chancellor Palp-ateen and makes her bid for a powerful position in the Imperial Senate. She then leads the way in banning light sabers and blasters from the Galaxy, except of course in the hands of Palp-ateen's army and security detail. The Jedi, their weapons now confiscated by the puppet Minister of Justice, Junket Reeknow, are either exiled or imprisoned (a few are also found dead of self-inflicted light saber wounds). Thus, the order is all but destroyed.

Meanwhile, Palp-ateen uses forbidden cloning technology to raise up a vast army of identical followers, each of whom has an IQ of 64.

Palp-ateen's goons now rape and plunder the Empire with impunity; however, a small band of rebels begins to strike back. Thus begin the Clone Wars. When one of the rebels uses a gallon of gasoline and a 99-cent Bic lighter to torch the Imperial Senate building, Anakin, now a young adult and student at the University of Bar-Qli, is trampled by the fast-exiting Hellara Clinggon, knocked unconscious, and burned almost beyond recognition.

Upon recovery, Anakin fakes his death, collects the life insurance, and assumes the brand name of a popular variety of toasted cracker ("Darth Vaders"). Embittered against the rebels, he embarks on an evil crusade to assist Emperor Palp-ateen, who seals the deal by offering young Vader his own TV show and a lifetime supply of Turtle Wax. When the TV show flops due to poor ratings among the general population, Vader becomes even more zealous in his tyrannical crusade on behalf of the Emperor. He begins to design and build a weapon that will wipe the rebels out for good.

Rated PG-13 for disturbing images and obscene political philosophy.

[proust]

TPM hurt me in ways I can't describe. I thought Lucas was above flatulence jokes.

Proust

[CaptRon]

@#$%!&* Jar-Jar!

[ArcLight]

You are such an ass! :-) LOL!!

[Dimensio]

I never heard this about N'Sync. Are you for real? What a wretched idea! Thank heaven it was abandoned.

Pretty old news, came and went within days. The word was that N'Sync was to have a cameo appearance as a group of Jedi -- all of whom would be killed during ensuing firefight. Apparently the fans reacted negatively to the news that N'Sync would be in the movie (I would have enjoyed seeing them get wiped out, even if it was just fiction) and their part was cut.

[Landru]

"...plus cameos by the N'Sync boys."

Naturally, you're kidding.
Right?
You are kidding...

The last one was beyond horrible; so, aside from an appearance by N'Synch Boys?
It can only get better.

[js1138]

If I could make a train wreck that hauls in 980 million dollars, I'd probably make a part II. And speaking of train wrecks, Harry Potter is #2 all time box office worldwide.

[Paradox]

Yeah, at home viewing bump!

[butter pecan fan]

Here's a challenge -- try to find every joke, pun or jibe. There's about 20 of 'em. 8-)

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

Anyone have a link that works?

[Sir Gawain]

Corrected link (Clone War)

Breathing

Forbidden Love

Mystery

[Dimensio]

The link works, but the site is designed to reject "referral" links from non-approved sites. Go into the URL address bar and hit "Enter" or just copy the URL and paste it into the address bar and it should work.