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Funny?
1 posted on 12/19/2001 4:38:10 PM PST by aculeus
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To: aculeus
That Sherlock Holmes joke is crap. I know a far better one.
296 posted on 01/10/2002 11:50:39 AM PST by jjbrouwer
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To: aculeus
Another one?

From a Hawaiian grandmother to her mainland kinfolk,

Dear Loved Ones,

I just couldn't wait to tell you about a wonderful experience I just had.

The other day I went to the local religious book store where I saw a
"Honk if you really love Jesus" bumper sticker. I bought it and put it on the
back bumper of my car, and I'm really glad I did. What an uplifting
experience followed.

I was stopped at the light of a busy intersection just lost in thought about
the Lord and didn't notice that the light had changed to green. Why, that
bumper sticker really works! I found lots of people who love Jesus. Why,
the guy behind me started to honk like crazy. He must really love the Lord
because pretty soon he leaned out his window and yelled, "Jesus Christ!"
as loud as he could. Why, it was like a football game with him shouting,
"Go, Jesus Christ, Go!" Everyone else started honking too, so I leaned
out my window, waved and smiled to all those loving people.

There must have been a guy from Florida back there because I could hear
him yelling something about sunshine, and I saw him waving in a funny way
with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I remembered that when I had
asked my twin grandsons what that meant, that they kind of looked at each
other, giggled, and told me that it was the Hawaiian good luck sign, ... so I
leaned out the window and gave the guy the Hawaiian good luck sign right
back.

A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they
got out of their cars and were walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray,
but just then I noticed that the light had changed and I stepped on the gas.

It's a good thing I did, because I was the only car to get across the
intersection.

I looked back at them standing there. I leaned out the window, gave them
a big smile, and held up the Hawaiian Good Luck sign as I drove away.

I just praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!

Well, I've got to go now. Y'all be good.

Love ya,

Grandma

313 posted on 01/10/2002 1:35:04 PM PST by Quester
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To: shaggy eel
I rather like -- "Q: How do you get a pommy out of your swimming pool? A: Throw in a cake of soap" -- and "Q: How do you save a pommy from drowning? A: I don't know!" -- myself.
319 posted on 01/11/2002 12:20:24 AM PST by Brian Allen
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To: aculeus
I wish I had time to tell the "monkey joke"
323 posted on 01/11/2002 11:39:49 AM PST by KSCITYBOY
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To: aculeus
Here's a true story. Once I was making a delivery to an old folks home. While inside, a very frail elderly woman walked up to me and asked me, in the sweetest voice: "Do you know why the ocean roars?" "No, why does it roar?" I replied, biting at the question. She whispered "You'd roar too if you had crabs on your bottom!"
334 posted on 01/24/2002 1:23:38 AM PST by pariah
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