Posted on 11/21/2001 4:26:07 PM PST by backhoe
Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936) The Female of the Species WHEN the Himalayan peasant meets the he-bear in his pride, When Nag the basking cobra hears the careless foot of man, When the early Jesuit fathers preached to Hurons and Choctaws, Man's timid heart is bursting with the things he must not say, Man, a bear in most relationsworm and savage otherwise, Fear, or foolishness, impels him, ere he lay the wicked low, But the Woman that God gave him, every fibre of her frame She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast She can bring no more to living than the powers that make her great She is wedded to convictionsin default of grosser ties; Unprovoked and awful chargeseven so the she-bear fights, So it comes that Man, the coward, when he gathers to confer And Man knows it! Knows, moreover, that the Woman that God gave him
This poem can be found, for example, in:
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Are you trying to muscle IB out of his position as "FR Flirt of the Month."
Then you need to go back to the dictionary.
All you need to to know about my weapon is that I keep it loaded and warm. Very few have found out much more about it, or even know that I carry.
Yes, you have! But I know you have big shoulders to carry this burden! It's been fun. Thanks.
Sorry, JR. I seem to have a lot of reprobates following me around these days ... it's my fault. I'm afraid I encourage it too much. Will you forgive me?
Also, Google has a pretty good web directory on Kipling
You make it sound like affirmative action.
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Does this remind you of anyone???
Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands.
This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other.
DANGEROUS: What's for dinner? SAFER: Can I help you with dinner? SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT? SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown. SAFEST: Wow! Look at you!
DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about? SAFER: Could we be overreacting? SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that? SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left. SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day? SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today. SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe.
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PMS TOP 14 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR :
Pass My Shotgun
Psychotic Mood Shift
Perpetual Munching Spree
Puffy Midsection
People Make Me Sick
Provide Me with Sweets
Pardon My Sobbing
Pimples May Surface
Pass My Sweatpants
Plainly; Men Suck
Pack My Stuff
Permanent Menstrual Syndrome
Pass More Sundaes
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Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle,actually find them 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND UDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY? BECAUSE NO-ONE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12' DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE.THE HOUSE!! - IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS #@*$!#@!... HOUSE!
I'm sorry...what did you ask me?
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Like I said, I am posting this for someone else..... I have NO clue what PMS is! Never had it, never will! "Please pass that hot fudge sundae over here!"
Really! Well, I never!!! Any man with skill can draw out the best lover in a female! (tongue in cheek!) I have heard that the book by Lou Paget, "How to be a GREAT LOVER" can change things.....maybe you want to pass it on to all the inept women you know? I have heard that Lou wrote one for men as well.
I should caution you, however. Do not give this book to any woman that you are not willing to commit to for the rest of your life! Once she reads it, you are HERS!!! female species are more powerful than the male. Josephine and Napoleon .....uh huh, uh huh!
Since when does politics have anything to do with what goes on between the sheets??? Check it at the door, man! A good lover will have you not caring about politics..... ::wink::
All those animal graphics in your posts?
And women's instinct ... honed to perfection. Some think they are base, animal instincts.
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