Driving Habits of The North American Soccer Mom

11/16/01

[IowaHawk]

What do you get when you mix Soccer Moms, SUVs and cell phones? Here's a brief photo essay illustrating the driving skills of Bill Clinton's most loyal voters.

[RippleFire]

Gives new meaning to going "cross country". How did she manage to do that?

[corkoman]

thats my wife!!!!

[Dakmar]

It looks like the truck couldn't wait for her to get the key from the attendant.

[IowaHawk]

As best as I can tell, she back up over it; she must have been traveling in reverse at, at least, 25 mph.

Note also how she still hasn't put down the cell phone, and is now yakking on it, next to the gas pump (can you say KABOOM?)

[TADSLOS]

Probably calling her Soccer Mom girlfriend to get her to pick up the soccer team - and hurry! (you can apply makeup and call me back on the drive there).

[IowaHawk]

I think the picture's from Florida; the cop car seems to read "Fort Lauderdale." As in Broward County.

As in dangling chads.

You do the math.

[RippleFire]

Ah! I see the dent on the right rear bumper now that you mention it.

[Bonaparte]

Photo 1 (top): Having hurriedly backed up onto island barrier to get that quaint shot of turban sporting proprietor shaking his fist, Sally Soccer is still unaware that she has demolished her undercarriage, thinking only, "Hmm, I wonder what that grinding sound was. Oh, well, I'll have the dealership take a look when I go in next week to find out why the interior has that funny smell ever since I installed the Al Gore air freshener."

Photo 2: As police arrive, Sally calls to them to please move their car, so she can get a shot of the quaint Mexican day laborers waiting for pick-up across the street.

Photo 3: Sally neatly places her Perrier and brain bag on the island, as she moves in for some close-ups of the ever-more-animated turbaned guy, who is apparently in the throes of fevered supplication to Allah.

[cibco]

ROTFLMCO!!!!!!!!

You nailed it.

[IowaHawk]

Your analysis solicited.

[proud American in Canada]

Well, IowaHawk, I emailed this thread to my husband at work, because about a month ago, when he was hunting & I was waiting with the kids at the car in the woods, I backed up quickly with the driver's door open, crashing said door into a tree stump, such that it could no longer close. We had to drive all the way on the highway with the door open.

YOu should have seen the looks we got. Now, Canada has strict laws about car conditions--the old duct-tape-holding-up-the-bumper method, which, as my husband so frequently & humorously points out, is so popular in my hometown of Chicago, doesn't fly up here.

Now, please do not ask why I did this. All I can say is I was watching the kids, not the door. In my defense, that's the first accident I've ever had in my life.

Of course, since we had no door and were driving through the isolated woods of Quebec, it was at this time that we saw the cutest little black bear cub approach our car, about ten feet away. We looked at each other and stepped on the gas a.s.a.p. just as Mom was exiting the woods right behind her youngster.

UtahGirl, I pinged you because I thought you'd find this story funny & would know others why might as well. :) Happy Friday!

[IowaHawk]

No duct tape body repair in Canada? What about Red Green?

[proud American in Canada]

You know, I haven't seen that show--and I just checked, it's on right now, so I just put it on. Is it a home repair?
A very close friend of mine is from a small town near Iowa City. She lives in Denver (where we used to live) & she is always talking about moving home.
Okay, Red Green is on. He looks kind of goofy, kind of like Mr. Rogers, he's trying to fix a kite. :) I'll have to watch him more often. They have a lot of good humor shows up here.

[proud American in Canada]

No, I guess Red Green is the guy with the beard. :)

[BlueLancer]

After facing off in a mating contest with the great Canadian Snapping Møøse, the loser .. a rare silver humpbacked Floriduh SUV .. is forced to perform symbolic urination, the ritual sign of defeat, to indicate submission to the winner.

[proud American in Canada]

LOL! Very good...

[RedWing9]

Red Green is one of the things I miss about living in Detroit. Aahhhh, CBC Windsor 9! Red Green and H.N.inC.!

[dighton]

Yeah, I see her all the time.

An on-topic oldie:

Soccer Mom Hooligans Riot at World Cup

[ken in texas]

I'm sorry... but you have to be a real bonehead to pull that off.

Just when you thought you've seen everything, someone else come along who's even dumber.