[LibKill]

"This cat smells like a port-a-potty on a hot day in Juarez."

ROTFLOL!

Why do people keep these little parasites anyway?

[anniegetyourgun]

Cute, huh? But never trust 'em.....

[muawiyah]

It works much better if you start up the shower, get in, then invite the cat to get in. Many of them enjoy the "edge" of the shower, but not the full spray. If you keep the shampoo out of their eyes/nose/mouth, they will actually come to enjoy it.

I only had one fighter, and he was the one who got the dirtiest. To bathe that cat you had to fill the tub, then hold him so his nose was out of the water.

Did you know cats can reach around behind their backs to grab your arm? It's true! And scratch - wow.

[glasseye]

I had a problem too....but it was with flea-dipping, 6 cats. I simply put them into travel carriers and lowered them into a large bucket of flea-dip. Boy, wish I had a wave file of the sounds these 'kittys' made, still makes me shiver. But it was quick for the kitty and I lost no blood. :-) (and yes, they still hate me)

[janeliberty]

Ever read the instructions for giving Kitty a flea bath. First you water it down, then starting with the head, apply the flea soap, working you way down the entire body. Once that's done, and if you're still in control, you need to let the soap sit on the cat for 5 minutes before rinsing.

Clearly the people who write the directions have never bathed a real cat!

Thank for the laugh.

[PJ-Comix]

I used to be worried about the reaction of my cat if I tried to bathe her. However, it got to the point where she smelled so bad that I took a chance and ran the bathtub faucet over her. She wasn't exactly pleased but surprisingly she didn't put up any fight. Actually I think she enjoys it but doesn't want to let me know so she sort of grumbles. I also shampoo her and use the flea comb on her because it is easier to brush away wet fur. The hardest part of the whole thing is drying her out. The big towel doesn't quite do the job. But at least she smells a lot better afterwards. I just bathed and shampooed her this morning.

[CheneyChick]

[boris]

I used to bathe my cats but I was losing too much blood. After each "bathing experience" my dwelling looked like a crime scene.

--Boris

[Burlem]

<A HREF= "http://www.geoffmetcalf.com/images/orwscs.jpg</A>

[LibKill]

How to Bathe a Cat:

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted.

3. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape). CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for any thing they can find.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power wash and rinse" which I have found to be quite effective.

6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.

Sincerely,

The Dog

[Fraulein]

The national record for cats is three latherings

Ain't that the truth! I just washed my cat on Saturday. He received 3 latherings, and I received 3 lashings!

[turk99]

Squirt some dish soap in the toilet, drop in the cat, flush it 2 or 3 times, and PRESTO!! clean cat.

[Junior]

The time comes, however, when a man must face reality: when he must look squarely in the face of massive public sentiment to the contrary and announce: "This cat smells like a port-a-potty on a hot day in Juarez."

Highly unlikely as real men will have nothing to do with cats. Cats may inhabit the same building as a man, but the critter only shares said domicile because said man is interested in another kind of feline ...

[LetsRok]

My cat "Newt Gingrich" likes to hang out between the shower curtain and the liner when I shower. I haven't attempted to bath him since he was a kitten. I value my skin.

[PatrioticAmerican]

I have a Pixie-Bob, which is part bobcat. I gave it a batch. Once. I went to work all beat to pieces and someone asked what happened. I said the funniest thing that kept me cracking up, "I gave a bobcat a bath." I just kept thinking of a redneck who was mad at a howling bobcat, so he gave it a bath. mean, just plain mean.

[Skooz]

I remember speech class in college. My topic for the how-to speech was "How to Bathe a Cat." I had two cats, Guido and Skooz (my namesake) and bathed them regularly. I got pretty good at it, but always walked away with quite a few scratches.

[TADSLOS]

I HATE cats. I truly do.

[Busywhiskers]

I would suggest a pressure washer or steam cleaner, then you can do it at a distance.

[EugeneConservative]

[mickeylee]

Know that although the cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, I recommend that you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding-glass doors as if you were about to take a shower.

LOL!!! Been there, done that!