Posted on 04/01/2025 7:57:08 AM PDT by Twotone
A child growing up in a broken home automatically puts them at a disadvantage. Studies across the board show that children of two-parent families have a better chance of success in education, in business . . . in life. Yet too often, society doesn’t do enough to encourage these unions, even saying it doesn’t matter. In his new book, “The Children We Left Behind: How Western Culture Rationalizes Family Separation & Ignores The Pain Of Child Neglect,” Adam B. Coleman explains how this is a terrible mistake of selfishness. An excerpt:
Why didn’t my father love me? Why did my father abandon me?
Why didn’t he show me how to become a man? Why wasn’t my father around to wipe away the tears that streamed down my face when I felt lost in this world and hated what I was becoming?
What was wrong with me?
Why was seeing me a couple of times a year satisfactory to him? Why would he always choose to leave in the middle of the night and never hug me goodbye?
Why did my father reject his only son?
Because my father is dead, there is no possibility of obtaining satisfactory answers to these questions. He neglected to establish a relationship with me, so these questions remain unanswered.
Unfortunately, I’m far from the only child in America to possess these unanswered questions about one or both parents, who left them behind to fend for themselves, questioning the purpose of their existence.
(Excerpt) Read more at nypost.com ...
Important to learn how to be a good parent of yourself. Quieting, calming, teaching self-discipline; building your own guardrails as you travel through life.
Traditional western/christian culture never "rationalized" this - it was forbidden and scorned.
Author needs to realize - its post-modern, marxist culture that has done this.
Yes, he says he’s still “nursing” his grievances. At some point old issues cannot be resolved & it’s time for forgiveness. I hope he can get there one day.
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i could answer these questions
this is the most single painful issue of my entire life.
drove me close to suicide for years
i was that absent father
twice
2 divorces
2 sons
i didnt stand a chance against the anti family anti marriage anti patriarchal anti Christian academic , legal and economical forces in our country .
many men like me ended up in addiction, prison or the grave.
ive seen it.
some few lucky men were able to overcome
i wasnt one of them.
i abandoned no one
i was drove away.
satan comes to rob , steal and kill.
i resisted and ended up metaphorically like steven in acts.
one son i have always had contact with and visited when ever pissible
the other will have nothing to do with me ( yet, i pray for a change )
both sons feel i abandoned them.
Wow. Pretty brave. I hope your sons can forgive you. Thank God for giving us forgiveness.
the one i have contact with
hates Christianity and conservatives.
One of the things she discusses n is the idiotic ACES tests which is considered gospel, but has been shown to be completely fallacious as an indicator of harm due to the way the control groups were set up, but it is embedded now. They have done subsequent studies (with well designed control groups and subject selection) that showed that children who have experienced these things are not more susceptible to adult mental pathologies than anyone else. But is this "test" is now the Coin of The Realm" for those who want to pigeonhole people experiencing normal difficulties of live. These are the questions they ask on an ACES test:
But there it is. It looks to me like an escape hatch for everything. But in the end, Leftists have an astonishing capability to reject responsibility for everything. It is a key difference between Leftism and Conservatism.
Commie trash hate the nuclear family — it embodies culture that they despise.
So, they convince males that it is OK to violate their oath. And, similarly convince females that they are better off without a man.
“One of the things she discusses n is the idiotic ACES tests ...”
I hope this type of thing can be thrown out of our schools once the Dept of Education is no more. I hope someone in HHS is aware of this, too.
I think it has been pushed all the way down to the state and local levels. The problem is, there is money to be had in declaring children needing psychiatric attention.
I think that approach is a crime.
I got 5 yeses from that list.
No. 4 of five kids, I was the focus of my father’s scorn.
the ironic thing...
both marraiges lasted 1.5 years
and both boys were
” Daddy’s boys “
they only wanted mom for meals.
Why didn’t he show me how to become a man?
I can't say what happened in his particular situation.
But if you look at the big picture, starting with LBJ's Great Society....the government has replaced the role of the father in the American family.
Fathers are declared redundant by the state.
Mothers get more $$$ if they kick baby daddy's out of the home.
How many times does some kind of wire or "wire" stitch thru your left ear? Right ear?
Do you understand, that I could have asked:
How many times does some kind of wire or "wire" stitch thru your right ear?But instead, I abbreviated that long string of words, shortening it to: "Right ear?"Did you seek "grief counseling" as a result of reading thru the above, so far?
Was that "so far" too far?
God bless you.
My brother faced the same situation. He lost his home and much of his money to his ex-wife in their divorce, and she poured poison into the ears of their young son, made it difficult to see the boy, kept him away from our family, etc...
My brother continued to work hard, bought another home, advanced in his career, etc...
That situation changed when his ex-wife became a disabled and dysfunctional alcoholic, bankrupted herself, and had another dysfunctional alcoholic boyfriend in the house. My brother was able to step in as the stable support and main parent for his son. Our family and cousins his age provided him a new social and family network.
The boy is now an adult, and my brother and his relationship is fantastic.
Of course, our culture has viewed and presented the children as inevitable collateral damage when the marital magic is gone.
Of course, our culture has viewed and presented the children as inevitable collateral damage when the marital magic is gone.
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