I’m shocked. Shocked, I tell you.
Now some interesting news.
Five hundred Hezb’allah terrorists have been eliminated, with 12% of those sustained this week alone. Many more have been seriously injured and are certainly out of commission. Most injuries and fatalities were occasioned by exploding hand-held devices, a few more by precision bombings by the IDF.
We may never know exactly how, when, or where the devices were manipulated to explode, but it is the most ingenious, audacious event in military history.
When Hezb’allah learned their cellphones were compromised, they bought 5,000 pagers and instructed their people to use them; when the pagers simultaneously exploded, they instructed their people to use walkie-talkies; and when those exploded, they had to meet in person where they were eliminated in a precision bombing.
Hezbollah: USE PAGERS INSTEAD OF CELL PHONES *beep beep BOOM*
Hezb: I MEAN WALKIE TALKIES *beep beep BOOM*
Hezb: ok emergency meeting at the WeWork until we figure this out *BOOM BOOM BOOM*