[E. Pluribus Unum]

1. Duct tape him to a chair

2. Give the parents baseball bats

3. Admit them to the room

4. Close the door for five minutes.

[fortes fortuna juvat]

Give the parents baseball bats
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>.
He’d probably die too quickly. Better to provide the parents with comfortable seating where they can watch him being torn limb from limb by a pack of hungry pit bulls.