Nan, Nan... Hill, I am so sorry to hear about the situation with Paul. It, it is just terrible. No, no, stop crying... It, it can all be blamed on Trump. Don’t worry, don’t worry. No, no you are still going to be speaker. Everything is OK. We are going to win in all 50 states and you will have a super majority in the Senate and House along with all the governor’s races, local and state elections, and down to the school boards. Yes, yes it’s alright. No, even the Supreme Court is going to be ours. Yes, we have a plan for that too.
Joe? Joe is doing fine. We adjusted his meds. Yes, we adjusted them. No, he won’t be in the picture, and Kam. No Kam yes, yes she is. She will be on Airforce 2. No, it’s going down, it’s all under control. Yes, we will be able to blame Trump for that too.
I just need you to listen. Just listen. You need to stop crying. Oh, I am sorry... your laughing. OK. But listen, listen you must remember our deal. Yes, yes you are going to name me as your VP. Yes, Vice President. Nan, now put the glass down. No, no I can hear the ice cubes clinking. Oh, wait, I am sorry those are my ice cubes. Yes, yes it won’t be long now.
Now, but Paul. Yes Paul, your husband, and his friend. Yes, he is. But no, but, no, we are going to take care of his friend. Don’t you worry about that. My team is on it. NO, no he won’t be causing you any more trouble. Yes, yes, we already have a note and a web page. Yes, Trump will be blamed for that too. Now listen Nan. No, no, you need to stop laughing, yes yes, he is a bastard. But Nan you need to listen, you need to listen now. We have to do something about Paul... Yes, yes, his story doesn’t make any sense.
No, he won’t feel a thing. Oh OK, we will make it very painful then. Now stop laughing. Stop laughing. Yes Nan, you will be inaugurated right on schedule.
if this guy has serious dirt on Pelosi, once he’s released his life span will be measured in days.
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If the perp survives his suicide he will be paid handsomely for quickly pleading guilty and taking a vow of silence.