Posted on 09/01/2019 4:49:41 AM PDT by Kaslin
Joe Biden leads the Democrat pack and hes a catastrophe, meaning that we have to weigh the human kindness that compels us to seek to end his humiliation against the practical reality that this doddering establishment weirdo will get squashed by Donald Trump like a dung beetle under a steamroller. Or even like an ex-Beatle under a steamroller Biden is the Pete Best of American politics, the guy who never quite made it. Except Pete Best wasnt a gropey, senile, corrupt Democrat plagiarist with delusions of adequacy.
And every day, [Pick A Nickname] Joe is getting worse.
Now, Joe used to have this kind of goofy charm. He was and remains a doofus, but a harmless one, sort of like that dorky neighbor who makes circus music play in your head every time he wanders over to your yard to tell you a long and ultimately pointless story about how he saw a squirrel and the squirrel had a nut and it was a fuzzy squirrel and it lived in a tree and how he likes squirrels.
But his regular guy act is wearing a bit thin. His appeal used to be that of someone who liked Budweiser and talking about sports and who did not give off the kind of smarmy condescension vibe to normal people who work for a living that is now so typical of blue state libs. Joe Biden leads the Democrat pack and hes a catastrophe, meaning that we have to weigh the human kindness that compels us to seek to end his humiliation against the practical reality that this doddering establishment weirdo will get squashed by Donald Trump like a dung beetle under a steamroller. Or even like an ex-Beatle under a steamroller Biden is the Pete Best of American politics, the guy who never quite made it. Except Pete Best wasnt a gropey, senile, corrupt Democrat plagiarist with delusions of adequacy.
And every day, [Pick A Nickname] Joe is getting worse.
Now, Joe used to have this kind of goofy charm. He was and remains a doofus, but a harmless one, sort of like that dorky neighbor who makes circus music play in your head every time he wanders over to your yard to tell you a long and ultimately pointless story about how he saw a squirrel and the squirrel had a nut and it was a fuzzy squirrel and it lived in a tree and how he likes squirrels.
But his regular guy act is wearing a bit thin. His appeal used to be that of someone who liked Budweiser and talking about sports and who did not give off the kind of smarmy condescension vibe to normal people who work for a living that is now so typical of blue state libs. You were talking about the old Joe when you talked about old school Dems, the party of the workin man instead of the party of the illegal alien, government drone and bitter SJW. These salt-of-the-earth folks were the very people that Trump who spent his whole career working with union guys to build stuff instead of bloviating for a living like the New Class elites are wont to do appealed to and stole right out from under the Democrat coalition. Not that many Democrats minded losing the white working class Felonia Milhous von Pantsuit famously wrote off people who sweat when they work, probably because of all that unjust privilege held by guys who drive Mac trucks or fix toilets.
Joes big sell is that he could get these Normals back in the fold, and that was a threat for a while, except Joe has not only dived way left with his party but the scrutiny he has invited has changed the Biden narrative, and not for the better.
Heres the thing you are not going to win back hardworking middle-class voters by promising to pay for the medical care of illegal aliens who shouldnt even be here in the first place. And its pretty hard to trash the current medical system when its the system you and your boss Barack Obama forced us all into in the first place. Getting huffy when you get asked how many genders there are and then get a follow-up of So, whats number three? does not help you appeal to real people either.
But everyone goes left in a Dem primary, and Joe would no doubt try to pivot back in the general. He might be able to pull off his centrist scam again after the convention, and if that was his only problem, he might have a decent shot.
But its not his only problem. Hes got a whole bunch of problems and Trump will mercilessly twist the knife in every one of them.
Lets start with his family. His relatives were apparently brazenly peddling Joes influence to the Chi-coms and the Ukrainians and probably others. While that wont upset the mainstream media it only cares about fake TRUMP RUSSIA TREASON baloney when it comes to foreign influence peddling normal people will find that disturbing. And the mainstream media can no longer treat such stories the way the big Indian (no relation to Elizabeth Warren) treated Jack Nicholson in One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest because we now have alternative media to get out the word on this sordid corruption.
And lets not even get into his son Cokies bizarre lifestyle. Well, Mr. Vice President, the good news is your son is no longer married to your other sons widow. The bad news is he left her to marry someone else then knocked up yet another woman.
Even putting aside his disturbing skinny-dipping fetish, theres the gal-groping. He seems to be trying really hard not to get handsy with the local talent, but you know hes going to slip up. He cant help it. Hes not a mere hugger. Hes gross, and thats already defining him.
Now, maybe you can survive some tarnishes on the old image. Hell, people still voted for the Clintons again and again. But its hard to survive being defined as an incoherent bull-Schiff-er.
Joe is the Gaffe-O-Matic, with a new embarrassment every day exuding from his ever-open piehole. One day hes standing in New Hampshire extolling the virtues of Keene, Vermont. The next day hes creating his own ever-morphing Sarajevo sniper story about pinning a medal on a corporal, or was it a Navy captain? Theres a significant difference, in that the corporal actually works for a living. And a young Navy captain? Let me assure you that no O6 in any branch qualifies as young.
And it just goes on and on. Joe was always a clown, a joke, the politician other pols sent to pick someone up from the airport. If he was a member of the Corleone family, hed be Chris.
But now this ancient, crusty nimrod wants to have his finger on the button. At 76 today, hes just not all there, and he was never much there to begin with. His handlers will rightly worry that when he wanders down to the Oval Office in the morning hell be in a loose, flapping bathrobe because he forgot to change out of his pajamas. Assuming he was even sleeping in PJs and not going commando. Its not like the Oval Office hasnt been the scene of cringey antics before. Four years of this guy? He cant handle four minutes onstage without embarrassing himself.
Joe desperately needs an intervention, but he wont get one. We normal people think hes a Dumb Man Walking, and the polls indicate way too many Democrats think hes the cream of their commie candidate crop, the one with the best chance to take on Trump. So, hell keep mortgaging his dignity until he either wins the nomination or the Democrats decide to go all-in on the Stalinist, or the Squaw, or the Furry, or Stevie Nicks 2.0, or one of the other members of their primary freak shows cast.
Right now, Trumps gotta be rolling with laughter.
Oh well. It couldnt happen to a nicer party.
You were talking about the old Joe when you talked about old school Dems, the party of the workin man instead of the party of the illegal alien, government drone and bitter SJW. These salt-of-the-earth folks were the very people that Trump who spent his whole career working with union guys to build stuff instead of bloviating for a living like the New Class elites are wont to do appealed to and stole right out from under the Democrat coalition. Not that many Democrats minded losing the white working class Felonia Milhous von Pantsuit famously wrote off people who sweat when they work, probably because of all that unjust privilege held by guys who drive Mac trucks or fix toilets.
Joes big sell is that he could get these Normals back in the fold, and that was a threat for a while, except Joe has not only dived way left with his party but the scrutiny he has invited has changed the Biden narrative, and not for the better.
Heres the thing you are not going to win back hardworking middle-class voters by promising to pay for the medical care of illegal aliens who shouldnt even be here in the first place. And its pretty hard to trash the current medical system when its the system you and your boss Barack Obama forced us all into in the first place. Getting huffy when you get asked how many genders there are and then get a follow-up of So, whats number three? does not help you appeal to real people either.
But everyone goes left in a Dem primary, and Joe would no doubt try to pivot back in the general. He might be able to pull off his centrist scam again after the convention, and if that was his only problem, he might have a decent shot.
But its not his only problem. Hes got a whole bunch of problems and Trump will mercilessly twist the knife in every one of them.
Lets start with his family. His relatives were apparently brazenly peddling Joes influence to the Chi-coms and the Ukrainians and probably others. While that wont upset the mainstream media it only cares about fake TRUMP RUSSIA TREASON baloney when it comes to foreign influence peddling normal people will find that disturbing. And the mainstream media can no longer treat such stories the way the big Indian (no relation to Elizabeth Warren) treated Jack Nicholson in One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest because we now have alternative media to get out the word on this sordid corruption.
And lets not even get into his son Cokies bizarre lifestyle. Well, Mr. Vice President, the good news is your son is no longer married to your other sons widow. The bad news is he left her to marry someone else then knocked up yet another woman.
Even putting aside his disturbing skinny-dipping fetish, theres the gal-groping. He seems to be trying really hard not to get handsy with the local talent, but you know hes going to slip up. He cant help it. Hes not a mere hugger. Hes gross, and thats already defining him.
Now, maybe you can survive some tarnishes on the old image. Hell, people still voted for the Clintons again and again. But its hard to survive being defined as an incoherent bull-Schiff-er.
Joe is the Gaffe-O-Matic, with a new embarrassment every day exuding from his ever-open piehole. One day hes standing in New Hampshire extolling the virtues of Keene, Vermont. The next day hes creating his own ever-morphing Sarajevo sniper story about pinning a medal on a corporal, or was it a Navy captain? Theres a significant difference, in that the corporal actually works for a living. And a young Navy captain? Let me assure you that no O6 in any branch qualifies as young. Recommended 'Bastion of Hate' Professors Demand KU Evict Chick-fil-A Todd Starnes
And it just goes on and on. Joe was always a clown, a joke, the politician other pols sent to pick someone up from the airport. If he was a member of the Corleone family, hed be Chris.
But now this ancient, crusty nimrod wants to have his finger on the button. At 76 today, hes just not all there, and he was never much there to begin with. His handlers will rightly worry that when he wanders down to the Oval Office in the morning hell be in a loose, flapping bathrobe because he forgot to change out of his pajamas. Assuming he was even sleeping in PJs and not going commando. Its not like the Oval Office hasnt been the scene of cringey antics before. Four years of this guy? He cant handle four minutes onstage without embarrassing himself.
Joe desperately needs an intervention, but he wont get one. We normal people think hes a Dumb Man Walking, and the polls indicate way too many Democrats think hes the cream of their commie candidate crop, the one with the best chance to take on Trump. So, hell keep mortgaging his dignity until he either wins the nomination or the Democrats decide to go all-in on the Stalinist, or the Squaw, or the Furry, or Stevie Nicks 2.0, or one of the other members of their primary freak shows cast.
Right now, Trumps gotta be rolling with laughter.
Oh well. It couldnt happen to a nicer party.
And it just goes on and on. Joe was always a clown, a joke, the politician other pols sent to pick someone up from the airport. If he was a member of the Corleone family, hed be Chris.
That is the funniest line Ive seen in my 20+ years on FR. Yes, lurking counts.
Am I just getting caught up in all the ‘Word Soup’, or does this article repeat portions of itself over and over?
Interesting, even entertaining article, but it was twice as long as it had to be to make it’s points.
There are far more than five states closed to the GOP: MA, NY, IL, CA, HI, WA, OR, for starters.
Dear old [Pick A Nickname] Joe is the best thing that could happen to the Democrat Party. (Yes, drive a stake through the evil heart of the Party of Hate.)
Everybody loves that harmless doofus with all that goofy charm.
The Democrats MUST nominate Uncle Joe! He's the best they've got!
Even if blacks stay home?
Free Joe and no interventions. Let Joe be Joe.
Joe desperately needs an intervention, but he wont get one. We normal people think hes a Dumb Man Walking, and the polls indicate way too many Democrats think hes the cream of their commie candidate crop, the one with the best chance to take on Trump. So, hell keep mortgaging his dignity until he either wins the nomination or the Democrats decide to go all-in on the Stalinist, or the Squaw, or the Furry, or Stevie Nicks 2.0, or one of the other members of their primary freak shows cast.
Right now, Trumps gotta be rolling with laughter.
Oh well. It couldnt happen to a nicer party or Joe!
LOL
Deja vu.
Deja vu.
Faucahontas cares more about the needs of illegals than about the needs of Americans. She's as nutty as Biden without his pawing 'charm'....
Deja vu.
I love Kurt, but the story about the COKE son getting ANOTHER gal knocked up after he just married that person he knew only a WEEK??? Could both of those be TRUE?
No, he just needs to go home & stay there. Maybe get a job at the local grocery if he gets bored or lonely. (My grandfather who moved with my grandmother to Florida after he retired.......he did not need the money, but missed talking to people so he got a part time job bagging groceries at Publix. It made him really happy.
I’m having deja vu all over again reading this post.
Kurt hits it out of the park again!
Petticoat Junction lyrics
There's a little hotel called the Shady Rest at the junction. And that's Uncle Joe, he's a movin' kind of slow at the junction, Petticoat Junction.
Slo-Joe Biden has been Washington since Granny Clampett was a little girl, (and he felt her up when nobody was lookin’).
SHHHH!
Don't tell them this!!
Dems are stupid, but even Dems arent stupid enough to give Slo-Joe the nomination.
It just wont happen.
Have you forgotten Hillary ALREADY???
all over again...
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