Posted on 03/15/2019 6:13:28 PM PDT by a little elbow grease
‘Wax My Ass, Scrub My Balls’
--- This Beto O’Rourke Poem Is Beyond Belief
Beto O’Rourke’s recently unearthed membership in the hacking group “Cult of the Dead Cow” may not have included the “edgiest sorts of hacking activity,” but it did, apparently, include writing murder fantasies and exceptionally bad poetry.
Writing under the now-exposed pseudonym “Psychedelic Warlord,” a teen-aged O’Rourke appears to be the author of a poem titled “The Song of the Cow,” published in 1988 by “cDc (Cult of the Dead Cow) communications.” “I need a butt-shine,” the poem begins … and it really all just goes downhill from there:
I need a butt-shine,
Right now
You are holy,
Oh, sacred Cow
I thirst for you,
Provide Milk.
Buff my balls,
Love the Cow,
Good fortune for those that do.
Love me, breathe my feet,
The Cow has risen.
Wax my ass,
Scrub my balls.
The Cow has risen,
Provide Milk.
The poem, for better or for worse, has been preserved forever by the Google Wayback Machine as a part of the group’s former website, cultdeadcow.com.
Here’s a screengrab of the entire poem:
(Excerpt) Read more at dailycaller.com ...
Beto Francis O'Dourke's ode to the cow.
We just may have the sickest contestant to the Presidency that we ever have had.
Ok literary freeper critics. How does Beto’s poetry stack up against Obama’s effort, the one about Pops and the stained underwear, IIRC?
“Wax my ass scrub my balls” .... Catchy campaign slogan
You know the noble leftists will lecture us about Irish Bob only being in high school. You can’t hold something like this against him. He’s a democrat, don’t you know!
Hollyweird scriptwriters don’t even come up with crap like this.
This guy is such a joke....
and it looks like some of our ammo has been saved for his idiotic run.
However, being a white male, the radical dems will probably take him out themselves.
I despise Beta, but this is a waste of time. I’m sure no one here said, wrote, or did any really stupid shit when they were a kid. The same can be said for MOST criticisms of presidential candidates for at least the last 20 years.
Darn you! Just spat chardonnay all over my phone!
He’s just flat out an idiot. Complete idiot.
Hey I think there is a song in there.. /S
This will only enhance his credibility with the Left.
Beto O'Rourke wrote poem asking a cow to 'wax my ass' and 'scrub my balls'
“Beto O'Rourke's youthful artistic experiments included a poem pleading for genital grooming and a sacred cow to lactate, according to newly unearthed documents. At age 16 in 1988, under the pseudonym "Psychedelic Warlord," O'Rourke, now 46, authored "The Song of the Cow" — a bizarre piece of experimental writing that included the lines asking for a cow to "buff" and "scrub my balls." “
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"The Song of the Cow" ISN'T THE ONLY ODD PIECE of written word recently unearthed from O'Rourke's past. In a Reuters investigation published Friday, it was discovered O'Rourke — who was a member of the hacking group "Cult of the Dead Cow" — also wrote a short story about a man running over a group of children in his car.
“As I neared the young ones, I put all my weight on my right foot, keeping the accelerator pedal on the floor until I heard the crashing of the two children on the hood, and then the sharp cry of pain from one of the two. I was so fascinated for a moment, that when after I had stopped my vehicle, I just sat in a daze, sweet visions filling my head," O'Rourke wrote.
Thankfully for O'Rourke's chance in the Democratic primaries, he is not alone in having a past filled with unusual writings.
In 1972, Sen. BERNIE SANDERS wrote an essay in the Vermont Freeman describing a woman who "fantasizes being raped by 3 men simultaneously." Sanders wrote: "And Men. Men are in pain too. They are thinking, wondering. What is it they want from a woman? Are they at fault? Are they perpetrating this man-woman situation? Are they oppressors? The man is bitter."
(my bold)
That is too funny to be real-it could almost be a line from that satirical song Mick Jagger wrote -I think it was called C***su***er Blues or something like that...
Colbert was sniping at him last night.
-PJ
_______________
Yes indeed.
"Wax My Balls, Hold My Calls"
I remember the CDC having a certian notoriety in the late 80s & early 90s, when I was a UNIX admin ...
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