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Hey Guys, Put a Ring on It
National Review ^ | February 9, 2017 | W. Bradford Wilcox & Nicholas H. Wolfinger

Posted on 02/09/2017 5:27:39 AM PST by C19fan

Marriage is not worth it. It’s not worth the financial sacrifices, the lost sexual opportunities, and the lack of freedom. All in all, it’s a ball and chain — of little benefit to any man interested in pursuing happiness and well-being. This is the view that we’ve encountered from many young men of late.

(Excerpt) Read more at nationalreview.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: adulthood; genderwars; marriage; men
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To: Mercat
I just sent the article to my 37 year old unmarried son. It has not yet occurred to him that he is running out of options. He says he wants to marry and have kids but hasn’t found the right woman yet. sigh

Has he looked at foreign women yet? I can understand why he wants to steer clear of most American college graduates.

41 posted on 02/09/2017 6:16:10 AM PST by PAR35
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To: C19fan

I am unmarried and not the least bit upset by this article. I have watched all the men in my family generation get screwed by divorce. I have seen a majority of men I work with get divorced. The divorce was painful but they are all happier. Who in their right mind would place such a significant wager on a 50-50 outcome?


42 posted on 02/09/2017 6:17:32 AM PST by Organic Panic (Rich White Man Evicts Poor Black Family From Public Housing - MSNBCPBSCNNNYTABC)
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To: C19fan

Closing on 60, I would say that marriage is not as necessary as before. It was a good way to raise kids but if my wife leaves me or dies, I am not going to remarry. I find that my friends are sufficient for companionship and marriage has taught me that you can learn to live without sex :)

If I decide to go to Alaska for a week, I can always find someone to go with me. That is more difficult if you are married and your wife won’t go, especially if the other person is a woman.
I am going to an island in May with my friends, some of whom I dated before I married. My wife would rather be boiled than go.
Is it possible some adultery might happen? No. Everyone is smart enough to know that would ruin the relationships so it stays off the table.
It amazing how cheap a vacation can be when you split it 10 ways. But I am a nearly 60 year-old millionaire who sleeps on a couch (my roommate snores)


43 posted on 02/09/2017 6:19:01 AM PST by AppyPappy
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To: C19fan

Last week, a friend of mine’s wife told him, after ten years and two children, that she wants a divorce. It’s all been a mistake, she said, and she never loved him. Oh, and she wants to keep the house and the kids. Now why aren’t young men rushing into marriage?


44 posted on 02/09/2017 6:21:23 AM PST by Rummyfan
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To: VanDeKoik
There is nothing sweeter for women and the state.

Legally it is the man who gets screwed.

This is why they fought same sex marriage for so long, it didn't allow a simple decision on which one would get screwed.

45 posted on 02/09/2017 6:21:24 AM PST by null and void (Trump's critics have evolved from expecting Trump to be Hitler to preferring it.)
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To: Mercat

True, but for him the upside is he hasn’t had to divide assets or pay out $1,000 a month to support kids he only sees once every two weeks. He’s obviously been very wise and careful; much respect to him.


46 posted on 02/09/2017 6:23:53 AM PST by ScottinVA ( Liberals' agony is my entertainment.)
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To: AppyPappy

Concerning remarriage if a spouse should pass away: I think I would rather live with good memories than a bad reality.

I’m pretty sure nobody would ever measure up to the amazing man I proudly call my husband!!!


47 posted on 02/09/2017 6:24:08 AM PST by karatemom
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To: C19fan

Get rid of “no fault” divorce laws. Make people either divorce for cause or walk away with nothing but what they had when they came into the marriage.

Then MAYBE you will see this trend turn around. Or ignore the problem and see it get worse.


48 posted on 02/09/2017 6:26:36 AM PST by Boogieman
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To: Mercat
I just sent the article to my 37 year old unmarried son. It has not yet occurred to him that he is running out of options. He says he wants to marry and have kids but hasn’t found the right woman yet. sigh

I waited until I was 38.

6-1/2 years later I lost my house, half my income, and worse, 85% of the time I could spend with my kids.

Could have been worse, under California law if we'd been married for 7 years, I would have owed alimony forever!

49 posted on 02/09/2017 6:27:34 AM PST by null and void (Trump's critics have evolved from expecting Trump to be Hitler to preferring it.)
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To: Rummyfan

>>>Last week, a friend of mine’s wife told him, after ten years and two children, that she wants a divorce. It’s all been a mistake, she said, and she never loved him. Oh, and she wants to keep the house and the kids. Now why aren’t young men rushing into marriage?<<<

My guess is she has a guy lined up already. Your friend will have to live through the pain of the divorce AND suffer the injustice that he has paid and continues to pay for some other man to live in his house, with his children. He will soon experience what is called the red pill rage. This is fueling the MGTOW movement.


50 posted on 02/09/2017 6:29:19 AM PST by BJ1
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To: karatemom

There are some considerations that make marriage attractive.

A guy in a neighboring county suffered a set back when he and his wife divorced. Because he has not remarried, she remains his wife in the eyes of the law. He can set up his will to leave her out but she can contest it because they owned property together that he got in the divorce.

He owns a bunch of land where he and his buddies hunt. If he marries one of his buddies, it breaks the connection with his ex. It creates an automatic pass-through to the new spouse.


51 posted on 02/09/2017 6:32:59 AM PST by AppyPappy
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To: C19fan

After all’s said and done, society’s purpose for marriage is to create a good environment for raising children.


52 posted on 02/09/2017 6:33:43 AM PST by cymbeline
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To: Rummyfan

“Oh, and she wants to keep the house and the kids.”

I find that many women have an unrealistic expectation when it comes to divorce. They think divorce is “Everything stays the same but he leaves”.
When that judge tells her to put the homeschooled kids into public school and “get a job”, the blinders come off.


53 posted on 02/09/2017 6:34:55 AM PST by AppyPappy
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To: Rummyfan
Oh, and she wants to keep the house and the kids. Now why aren’t young men rushing into marriage?

Hmmm? She doesn't want half of everything he earns for the rest of his life?

Lucky man.

54 posted on 02/09/2017 6:36:29 AM PST by null and void (Trump's critics have evolved from expecting Trump to be Hitler to preferring it.)
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To: ScottinVA
True, but for him the upside is he hasn’t had to divide assets or pay out $1,000 a month to support kids he only sees once every two weeks. He’s obviously been very wise and careful; much respect to him.

Only $1000/month?

Lucky man.

55 posted on 02/09/2017 6:38:32 AM PST by null and void (Trump's critics have evolved from expecting Trump to be Hitler to preferring it.)
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To: karatemom
Concerning remarriage if a spouse should pass away: I think I would rather live with good memories than a bad reality.

Overheard in a bar:

My wife's an angel.

You're lucky, mine's still alive!

56 posted on 02/09/2017 6:41:09 AM PST by null and void (Trump's critics have evolved from expecting Trump to be Hitler to preferring it.)
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To: C19fan
Western society is devolving into a more primitive form of social contract.

In very primitive societies the women live together and have children together and take care of the chores together. They use the men folk like sperm injectors and never really know who the father is once "knocked" up. The men hang out together and hunt and build stuff.

No marriage, no monogamy. The women are happy with this and often the women are in charge an form a true matriarchal society.

57 posted on 02/09/2017 6:43:59 AM PST by central_va (I won't be reconstructed and I do not give a damn.)
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To: BJ1
My guess is she has a guy lined up already.

Pretty sure she does although she says no. She's also undergone a major makeover in the last month or so (new hairstyle, breast enhancement).

58 posted on 02/09/2017 6:44:51 AM PST by Rummyfan
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To: Mercat

He’s running out of options? Lol. His options get better every single year.


59 posted on 02/09/2017 6:45:29 AM PST by DesertRhino (.)
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To: Rummyfan

What I have seen several times is that once women are in a committed relationship, they tend to let themselves go.

When they are “on the market”, they suddenly start exercising, lose weight, and look and act much better.

Not universal, but I have seen it numerous times.


60 posted on 02/09/2017 6:50:28 AM PST by marktwain (We wanted to tell our side of the story. We hope by us telling our story...)
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